"Not being able to fall in love even though you want it so bad."
Lenna's life in college is almost finishing and she hoped for one thing in her life: Success. But who said success didn't include having a growing relationship. A healthy, passionate...
"Yes, table for two," I assure to the waitress, offering a kind smile for finally finding a spot for Dave and me. A reply that Dave was so grateful for. He has been yearning for a dinner here since the opening, last week. 'The view is marvelous and the place...oh God, it's fucking luxurious! Do you know how many rich guys go there? I need to get one for myself at least.' Couldn't stop laughing about that when he told me. So, as a good friend, I did make reservations but it turned out they were not on the system. "Follow me, please." Dave sighs in relief and tidies up confidently. He offers me his arm which I gladly take, and we both begin to follow the women in an unhurried way, taking in everything that surrounds us. The inner area of the restaurant was wide enough to have a great number of chairs, filled with seemed-to-be-important people dressed up in expensive coats. Unlike mine. I wore a long white dress. Bare from the back and simple from upfront, to make me look with a bit of cleavage. Dave choose it and made me change when he came to pick me up and gasped when he saw I was looking way too casual for tonight. Didn't know a pair of jeans and a beautiful brown blouse were boring. 'Not Strong enough to call for attention. Not strong enough to show off your curves and true natural body to all those plastics that are going to be there,' as he said. He wasn't wrong for that, cause a few women did stare, and scanned me from top to bottom, creating a sense of confidence yet pressure within me. We finally stepped outside where a strong breeze caressed me completely, making me tremble in coldness. That's when I realize I wasn't wearing any bra under and my nipples were basically showing off. I wanted to cover myself but that would only show a lack of confidence. They're only nipples. No shame in that. I thought to myself. We continued walking until we took seats beside the jaw-dropping view. In a medium table with a gray table cover and already placed wine cups.
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"I'll be back to take your drinks!" She exclaimed before she left once we sat down. "I think I'm about to cry." He fixed his hair and began to look around. I chuckled and grabbed the menu meanwhile, he began taking a few pictures of the place and himself. I glanced throughout the options, and coughed when I saw the prices. "It's too high, huh?" Dave tilts his eyebrow, knowing that my reaction is readable. "It's something we can pay, " I smile. "But for sure I won't go out to another place again this month." He gives me an apologetic smile and he puffs his chest out. "For sure in that." I go back to the menu but once I lift my gaze to look around, I stiffen when I lock eyes with him. Luke. "Our boss is here," I murmur. "But don't look too obviously because—" He goes against me and does look around to spot him. "Because he's just behind you," I sigh. "Oh God I think I'm about to throw up." "Maybe we should go and say hi..." My eyes widened. "Don't you dare to do that." He begins to laugh so loudly, that I try to cover my face with my own hand. Dave knowing what happened with him in the office and the kiss, he just began to ship both of us so hard that he began fooling with me. I paled every time he joked with his name. And now I'm scared of what he's able to do knowing he's just a couple of seats from us. "Ready to order?" The waitress surges making me sigh in relief that she's covering my face of embarrassment from my own boss. The same one I'm attracted to. The same one who is devouring me with his own gaze. "Bring two dirty martinis." He lifts his hand to stop her. "Make hers dirtier." She nods and flies away to get it, leaving both of us finally alone. "Just relax Lenna. Don't let him see he affects you." Dave grabs my hand and I nod calmly. "You're right. Let's just ignore him and enjoy tonight." "No. I didn't mean it that way..." He smiles maliciously. I look at him confused. "My grandmother once said to my cousin, that a way to return appreciation to someone that recognizes your beauty, is to make eye contact with him, " he says proudly. "I can't." I touch my chest to feel my heart pounding way too fast. "His stare is too intense. He makes me nervous." "He is looking at you like a prey rather than an equal. And we want the opposite, right?" I remain silent, quite unsure of what I want. What does he want exactly? Or should I choose... "If you're unsure, At least use him as a sex toy. Imagine you get the chance of having sex with him! From all the horny women in the office, he chose you!" How do I tell him I'm a virgin? And that I don't want to give it to any man? But he's not wrong. I've been fantasizing his hands all over me and...making me his. Could it be worth it? "Yeah, you're right," I nod. "Shouldn't I be the one choosing and..." "Oh, God." He rolls his eyes. "Leave the feminism aside and let your pussy decide." I laugh way too loud at that and people glance at me startled. After a couple of minutes, our drinks come by and that's when I take advantage of taking a sip meanwhile, I look at him. Adrenaline runs through my veins and arousal invades my whole body, making me shiver. Dave continues to talk to the waitress about the food as I struggle to hold his gaze. I lift my eyebrow as soon as he begins to smile and look away first when the guy sitting next to him calls his name. I look back at Dave with a smile I didn't even know I had, and he only gives me a look of 'I told you'. We order our food, and once it rapidly comes to sit in front of us, we enjoy each bite. I make my best to ignore the man in the black suit I kissed months ago, and instead pretend it's only Dave and me in here. Until the urge to peeing, wins. "Be back in a sec." I smile at Dave and finally lift from my seat to look for the bathrooms, which apparently are far away from the bunch of people in the bar. A few men glanced at me but I never hold their stare for too long, cause I didn't care for their interest, except for his. Luke. I walk inside a small corridor that has both bathrooms gender beside each other that are completely empty and quiet. I close the door and make my way inside the room with a small silhouette of a woman's figure in the front door. As soon as I come in, I close the bathroom door and bend a bit down to pee. I sigh in relief when I'm done and wash my hands right before I leave to the corridor where I freeze when I see Luke standing outside with both of his hands inside his pant pockets. His beautiful dark eyes scan my body, making it feel like he was touching me everywhere. Every hidden spot. Every needed spot that I knew he could easily give me pleasure. My breathing changes as soon as he locks eyes with me. Those beautiful eyes. Jeez. "Hi, " I finally say. "Hi." He smiles. I swallow harshly and look sideways before asking, "You're here with friends?" He shakes his head. "With cousins, " he clarifies. He pauses and smiles again. "You're here with Dave Hill." I nod and look at him stunned. "I am." "I'm impressed that you remember his name." "I know name and background of the people who work for me." I tilt my head. "Including mine evidently." I clear my throat. "Ho—how...did the decision go?" I quickly say changing off topic. "Of...um...the small business—apartments—" His eyes glow with interest and I half smile kindly. Or flirty. It's Between those. "Gonna give the payment plan and a separate plan bill for roommates. And with businesses, trials will go in a low and high season." I mimic his reaction of awareness that he did what I thought about. Realization hitting me that he did exactly what I said. I bit my inner lip, trying to hide my emotion, and that's when silence took over between us, and tension-filled the air. "You look beautiful." His words echo way too deep in me that I instantly blush and look away for an instant moment. "Thank you." He takes a step closer and I gasp, locking eyes again with him. His eyes fill with lust, the nice guy vanishing and the dominant guy taking over. He just keeps staring and enjoying how nervous he makes me. That's when I finally decide to change things. "You don't like to waste time, huh?" He smirks and lowers himself, making it not easy for me. "I like to manage my time." He glances at my lips and I look at his, my breathing quickening. "And invest it on worthy things." "Is that what it is? Am I thing to you?" I already ask bothered, placing a hand on his chest to stop him. "A thing to use for a while?" His face twitches in amusement and that reaction finally touches a spot. A limit in me. "Sounds way too awful if you put it that way, darling." His hand travels toward my waist until he finally pulls me toward him way too urged. His warmth covers me and feels I'm crawling into it. He notices the closeness I'm seeking and before he attempts to lower himself he continues saying, "I want you, " he pauses. "You...to use me for a while." He lowers himself for a kiss but I pull his hair backward, and push into his chest, to avoid him getting near my lips. But he manages to drag me into the wall behind me, making it hard for me to break out from his hold. The one thing I'm starting to want from him. I don't want him to hold me like this. For a while I mean. I want him to hold me forever. I want to keep running away but this offer scares me. Just like an opposite would. He attempts to kiss me again but I glance sideways and his lips land on my cheek. Our breathing sync and he stays like that for a while, making me realize I was pulling him towards me for some reason. I hear his sharp breathing near my ear and then a lower tone laugh that makes me stiffen. "Let me be your sex toy, " he whispers. I grab his shirt, wetness dripping from where I want him to be licking. "Let me have you. At least one night, please." Oh, God. He slowly backs away, giving me time to recover and regain strength to stand correctly after what he actually said with no shame. Avoiding his look, I fix my hair and my dress and begin to walk away. I hear how he follows me behind and opens the door for me not before blocking it and saying, "Just think about it." Once I walk towards Dave and take a seat, he begins to talk about the show this old couple did in front of everyone. I act as if I'm giving him all my attention but my mind flashes everything, Luke, my boss, did. And said. I pretend to act surprise and drink, but my gaze falls on him, who is now leaving with the other men. He does not look at me again. And all I see is him, disappearing once he goes inside the building. I look back at Dave who continues to talk. And that's all I do.
