Redamancy

Lenna's POV. 11

Lenna

My mom used to say that our family, mostly women, was cursed with the flaw of being too emotional.
Crying when it wasn't necessary. Or over someone else hardships cause you related to.
Angry when we had to fully control ourselves before we said something we might regret later.
Happiness when we said the right words and offered the right affection to everyone.
Ending to let everyone fear us or see us as unguarded.
It came once in each generation. My grandmother from all of her sisters, my uncle from his brother and my mom, and then me.
I was the one gifted.
    And I came to accept that it wasn't something I couldn't control. Even when I couldn't forgive way too easily. Cry endlessly for no reason. And Love without a doubt.
A curse it is.
   Everyone believed.
  But I see it as a gift. One that makes me feel human. Myself.
     "I'm worried for you Lenna, " My sister said once when I cried over a romantic movie that I had already watched like five times, yet it still brought the same effect on me.
     "Why?" I sobbed as the credits came.
     "If you cry over nothing, Imagine what a heartbreak will do to you!"
    I rolled my puffed eyes and lifted my tissue to wipe my tears away. The contact already burning my skin after brushing them for the millionth time. 
       "You might get depressed and God knows what you could do!" She continued looking at me shocked at my appearance.
       "Dear Lord, you think I would kill myself for a man? Nah, he's not earning that privilege, " I said humorously. "Yes, I might get depressed like everyone does, but then..." I shrug. "He won't matter anymore."
       "Uncle Paul said once that our third cousin never left her husband even though he cheated on her five times. It was more like the—'hate me, hurt me but never leave me—situation."
      I furrowed my eyebrows in disbelief at what she was trying to say to me.
     "What about our aunt from dad's side that never realized her boyfriend was toxic because she was madly in love with him?"
      "And you really think I'm going to be like them? Hell, I'll rather stay single then." 
      My sister laughs bitterly which makes me tense and look at her annoyed. "Love blinds you, Lenna. Look at me—" She lifts her hands. "I fell for a boy who wasn't over his own ex."
     I laugh at that.
         "I told you he was hideous!"
         "Whatever! What I'm trying to say is that you don't know how things will end. Being in love makes you act stupid." She pauses and crosses her arms defiantly. "Nothing hurts most than knowing you've been used by someone you least expected to."
        Her face remains drastic and before she leaves she finally says, "Be careful, Lenna. Men will whisper pretty lies until you fall in their arms." 
      The door slam shut and I flinch.
    I blink a few times, after zoning out on the black leather seats of the cab I was into; The same one that was taking me for Dave's cousin's charity mission of selling basic t-shirts, as a favor like I promised.
     earlier today, Dave did remember to tell me the time I needed to head here and how everything was settled before my arrival. Once the car came to stop, I took my cash and paid. My steps became quicker and longer until they halted in front of a beautiful dark green desk, with a great amount of white, green, and nude t-shirts tucked nicely into different piles on top.
Besides it, a couple sat down selling a sort of jams of every flavor and opposite them, where two teenage girls laughing loudly while they took videos of each other.
Sighing I realized a woman was behind the spot I was supposed to be in. Her dark hair was tied up into a ponytail, and her gym clothes traced nicely her fit body. It gave the vibe of 'workout mom that's obsessed with her children's life at school.'
"You must be Elena!" She hung up as soon as she realized I've been standing in front of her for a while. "Dave's friend." Her cheeks rose and it revealed the botox she has been employing on her face which I bet has been a long time. Probably since her early thirties.
"Lenna actually." I smile effortlessly.
"Great! The prices of each shirt are on the money box, glued on the top. The seizes are on this book—" She points at a small white journal on the desk with the word 'Friday, in cursive gold letters. "And the bags are below!"
I nod and before I could talk she continued saying, "I'll pick everything up before five. Good luck!"
She waved at me and began walking away with another incoming phone call. As soon as she left, I took my place and texted Dave.