Room 103(Tom Holland AU)

Chapter 32

I drove around for about an hour, silently cursing myself for what I had done. It was safe to say I regretted it. Like a lot. Seeing him again is going to be so awkward. Finally, I parked outside the only place I had left to go. Biancas place. I could kiss Bianca for lending me her spare key. I had no idea whether she came home or not, so I would find out by knocking. It was still raining now but not as heavily as before.

I knocked three times and exactly five seconds later the door opened.

The expression on her face was mixed with surprise and confusion. She had surely heard of what happened.

As expected, "What the fuck happened at the cafe?" is the first thing she asks.

I laugh before she pulls me inside and closes the door shut.

Her eyes held curiosity, "Did you seriously pour coffee all over him?"

I take off my coat and give it to her. I shamefully nod.

Her mouth drops a little and she laughs while we walk over to sit on her couch.

"No way!" She screeches.

I sink into the couch and put my face in my hands. "I did. I did and I regret it."

She looks taken aback. "Why? He deserved it. Especially after what he said."

I guess she's right but still, I felt so guilty.

"Did I have any right to get mad though?" I ask genuinely curious. I feel like I overreacted.

She looks at me as if I'm crazy. "You had every fucking right."

I sigh, "I have no idea why he gets so mad whenever liams brought up."

Now she looks at me like I'm dumb. "U cannot be serious y/n."

"What?"

"He's jealous u idiot!"

Now it's my turn to look at her like she's crazy. I let out a small laugh. "Did you not hear anything he said?"

"Look," she says, "it is so painfully obvious that you two are fucking in love with each other."

My face twists up in disgust, confusion, and denial.

"Everyone can see but you two."

This whole time I've convinced myself I'm only attracted to Tom because he's attractive. I haven't ever thought about having real feelings for Tom. For if I did, I would be the one getting hurt. I would just be one of the girls who fell for him. Nothing new or special. Just pathetic.

I shrug contemplating the fact that I could've been in denial. "It doesn't matter, he would never actually want me." Even if I want him.

"Whatever, stay here for the night," she says getting up, "worry about that asshole later."

She heads off into the kitchen and I disobey her because I was already starting to worry about our next encounter.

I can't just never go home.

A few minutes later Bianca returns, holding a bowl of popcorn and more snacks than she could carry.

She smiles struggling to hold everything up. "Movie?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tom

I get up and run my hand loosely over my hair. It's the middle of the night and I can't sleep. Not when she's not here. God, I'm so pathetic.

The events of today playback in my head and I cringe.

What I said and her face when I said it. I didn't think she'd care. I mean why should she? She had Liam. I obviously regretted the words I said as soon as they came out of my mouth. Seeing her eyes, her sad eyes, while she bit back tears, was like a punch to the face.

I think she was crying in her car before I came, I don't know. I wanted to apologize because I did not mean those words. I hope she knows that. I was jealous. I was stupidly jealous.

Why? I have no fucking idea. I've never been jealous in my life—especially over a girl. So why now? No girl ever made me feel the way she does. Not even close.

I can't believe I'm actually admitting to it.

And then, of course, she threw her coffee all over me. The worst part is, I'm not even mad. I deserved it. I'd let her do it a thousand times more if she wanted to. I was a dick and I knew it. If only she knew why.

I bury my head in my hands. What the actual fuck was I even thinking right now? I shake it off as just feeling guilty. I did not have feelings for y/n.

Even if I did, it's not like she would want to be with someone like me. She wanted someone sweet and kind like Liam. Not that he was any of those things but she wanted the facade he had put up. The exact opposite of me. He made her laugh, while all we ever did was have banter.

It was especially obvious after the kiss we had shared. She said it was a stupid thing for us to do, without knowing I would've done it a million times more.

I have no idea where she is now. Probably at fucking Liam's house, telling him he was right about me.

I laughed bitterly and shook my head. She deserves so much better than me.

I had lied before at the cafe. I clearly couldn't get every girl I want. I don't have her.

The only girl I'll ever want.

I internally smack myself for the kind of thoughts I was having. I lie back on my bed. I tell myself I'm just tired from the lack of sleep, I'm not thinking straight.

Then again I'm never thinking straight.

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Sorry if this chapter was boring but I really wanted to write from toms point of view. So u guys can finally see what he's thinking. Anyway they've both lowkey kinda accepted they like each other? But are still very much in denial because well, this is a wattpad story🤷‍♀️ and because they're stupid.
Also tysm for 200 followers !!! I love y'all <33
Alsooooo y'all should check out the story his heavenly sins on. 3DINNERS because it's written by me! It's a long story as to why I'm not writing it on here but this is like forever my main account so dw. The account is run by 2 people lolzzz but yeah if u like my shit then go check out his heavenly sins :) thank you!! Bye >33