Silent

Chapter 24

Loren's POV

I couldn't stand being in the same house as Aunt Jenna. I love her, but it just gets too much sometimes. I wanted to sleep but I couldn't. I decided to go out and get fresh air. Maybe I'll be so tired that I can sleep through anything. 

I was walking around the town and I wasn't getting tired. I felt like something was gonna go wrong. But I always felt like that. Nothing ever seems to go right for me. 

I was zoning out and I walked right into another person. It scared me a bit. "Oh, I'm so sorry!" She said quickly. 

I hit my forehead so I put my hand to it quickly. "I'm sorry... I zoned out. I should have been paying more attention." 

"No, honey, it's my fault. I'm so sorry." She said. "What's a young girl like you doing out here by yourself?" She asked. 

I looked up and my whole world stopped. She must have noticed my expressions because she asked if I was ok.

I let out a blood curdling screech. 

I tried to run away but I tripped and fell. I rolled over and leaned against the wall. "I-I-" I couldn't speak. 

"Honey, are you ok?" She asked. 

It was the girl from my nightmares. 

The girl that my dad hit. 

I immediately curled up into a ball and cried. 

"Are you ok? I'm sorry if I scared you." She said getting down close to me. 

I looked up and gave her a good look. "You're ok..." I mumbled. 

"Yeah, I am. We just ran into each other." She said with a laugh, trying to make me feel better. 

"No. No, not that." 

She looked at me real closely. "Do I know you?" She asked. 

"No. I don't think so." 

"No, I do!" She said. "You're my brothers friend. Brett Meer? You must be Loren Areno. I picked him up from school and I saw you two talking." 

"You're Brett's sister?" I asked. She nodded. "He should have let me die there..." I mumbled. 

"Hun, what are you talking about? Are you talking about him saving you from that accident?" She asked. 

"Yeah." I said with a sob. "I should have died there..." I mumbled.

"Loren, he did an amazing thing. I love him for doing that. The same thing happened to me-" 

I cut her off. "I know. I had nightmares about you before it even happened." I said. 

"Here. Come sit down on the bench over here. Tell me what's going on. I can't leave you like this." She said. 

I explained the whole thing about mom dying and how I was staying with the Curtis' and pretty much everything. "So you had a nightmare before the accident even happened? I'm still confused." She said. "I'm sorry." 

"Well, on the drive that they took me on, I thought it would help. But all I saw was my dad hit you. It was my own family that hit you." I broke down and cried. "I'm so sorry. I've wanted to talk to you for so long and apologize but I only knew your name and I didn't know how to find you and then I thought maybe you died." 

She stopped me. "Why would you need to apologize?" She asked. 

"Because I could have prevented it! If I was just a good daughter, I could have kept him from getting drunk. If I had known sooner, I could have helped my mom and she wouldn't have died." 

"Loren. Look at me." She said. I looked up and she looked me dead in the eye. "None of that was your fault. You were a kid. Your mom had cancer. You knowing sooner couldn't have helped. Your dad made his own decisions. But I want to tell you something... it's all about forgiveness. I'm glad you came back to Oklahoma. You have to do what's best for you. So if getting away from all of it was what you needed, you did the right thing. It's not running away from your problems. It's doing what's best for you. I really have to go, but I'm so glad I got to talk to you. I wish you the best and I'll see you soon. Brett talks so highly of you and I hope you and him stay friends. He's the best brother and I'm sure he's a great friend. I know, I as one person cannot help you. But forgive yourself. I'd love to talk to your dad. Let him know I forgive him. But I think you really need to forgive him." She said. She stood up and gave me a hug. "I'm proud of you for making it this far." She said. 

I smiled. "Thank you." I said as we pulled away. 

She walked off and it took me a second to realize... she was right. 

I need to forgive him. 

I thought I did. I really did. 

But I need to let go.

Let him know that I do love him. 

But I felt better. 

I guess this walk worked. 

I could sleep through anything.