Classified light- a criminal minds fan fiction

Tired

Hands wrapped around Cameron's neck, the grip growing to an excruciating level like he had never done before.

He had grabbed her, he had hurt her before- but never with this much rage.

This was pure, uncontrolled, uncalculated- intense rage.

Her back pressed further into the Palace wall, desperately reaching for anything on the desk bedside her.

Looking back now, she had felt the letter opener in her hand, it was in her reach, it was in her hand- but she dropped it.

Why did she drop it?

Maybe this was her last hope of it finally ending.

She had tried to think of ways to escape, to run, to live.

But she wasn't brave enough to try yet- she didn't have to be brave to do this, to do nothing.

The lights dimmed in the room, no, not the lights- her light.

This was the first time Cameron thought that the Prince was truly was going to murder her, the first time in weeks that she had hope again.

And then he let go.

And the light came back.

And the hope was crushed once again.

But there was something else, a disappointment on his face at how he lost control, at how uncalculated it was, at how he lost his plan.

Cameron made it her mission to get him to that point again, to get him to end it- but he never did.

He learnt his lesson as much as she did.

And he wasn't ever letting her forget it, the bruises on her throat for weeks after wouldn't either.

She was trapped there, in his home, with him, and this was going to end whatever way he wanted, whenever he wanted.

She knew it then, that this was never going to end.

Killing her wouldn't be enough, death wasn't enough of a punishment in his mind.

She feared what line was too far for him to cross if death was easy.

She would soon learn in the following weeks that the line did not exist as he commanded her to take off her robe for him before ripping it off for himself.

Cameron was suddenly sat up in her bed, clutching her robe close to her despite the sweat dripping down her forehead.

Her breathing was scattered, her hands shook and her vision blurred out of control.

For a moment she could almost feel his hands on her throat again, as if he were reaching through time itself and somehow finding her now.

She carefully got out of bed as not to wake Hotch, tiptoeing down their 3rd floor stair case from their loft room onto the creaky floor, past Jack's room where Cooper slept on his bed.

Bingbong had taken to sleeping in Cameron and Hotch's bed curled up right next to Hotch, an unexpected friendship between the two quickly blossoming although it was clear both of the dogs preferred Cameron over anyone else when both of the dogs would end up snuggled next to her every morning without fail.

Cameron sat on their front porch and tried to gather her breath, the shaking in her hands telling her that it would be staying there for a while even when the heat of her skin wore off and the cold of December started to hit her.