Delilah

40-When It's Right, It's Right

Sometimes in life you just really need your best friend. 

That one person in the whole world who understands you better than you understand yourself. 

I knew that I had to talk to Bailey about it, I needed her opinion more than anything. She would give me the honestly I needed while making sure whatever the decision was I was the one to make it. 

I love her for that. Which is why I was currently sitting on a park bench calling her. I still hadn't gone home, home was the apartment. I couldn't go there right now. 

Hell I will probably sleep in my car tonight.

She picks up and I hear her cheery voice in my ear, "What's up Dee."

I sigh, "Oh no spill what's wrong."

"Cole proposed to me." She gasps. "No way." 

I hear her squeal before settling down, "Are you not happy about that?"

Am I happy that Cole wants to marry me? Yes. 

Is it too fast? I don't know...is it?

"I just we've only known each other since August." I say. 

She hums, "Ok and?"

What?

"And what? Isn't it too fast? You think it's too fast right?"

"You know that saying love has no timeline or however it goes."

"Yeah."

"Well that's what I am saying. You love him, he loves you. He wants to marry you. If you want to marry him then it's clearly not too fast."

"Won't people think its fast?" I ask biting my bottom lip nervously. 

"Who cares what other people think, its not their relationship. When it's right, it's right."

 I sigh leaning my head back on the bench. 

"Do you think it's too fast?" I ask her. 

She groans, "What did I say about not caring what other people think."

"You don't count Bailey and you know it."

She laughs, "I think that if you want to get married, you should get married. You just better make sure I get to give the maid of honors toast, oh and I want you to rig the bouquet toss so I get it."

"That defeats the purpose of the bouquet toss Bee, and you know you were always going to be my maid of honor."

"And you will be mine. Except clearly matron of honor since you're getting married before me."

I furrow my brows, "How do you know that?"

"This whole conversation we had, not once did you say you didnt want to marry him. I know you do Dee. I am just waiting for you to realize you do. Remember that Noah and I saw you guys a few weeks ago and you both look like you'd hang the moon for each other."

My heart does flutter at the thought of being married to Cole. 

"What about the last time I got married, I mean doesn't it seem weird to get married again less than three years later?"

"That marriage wasn't real and you know it. Matt was a manipulative piece of shit and never deserved to get married to you. Cole loves you and he wants to get married to you because of that. Without asking I know he asked Cal for permission."

I sigh, he really did. I didn't even have time to think about the fact that Cal gave it to him. That he approved of Cole asking to marry me. 

"Cal can see that you guys love each other. So can I, so can the whole freaking world. If you want to marry him marry him. Also how did you leave it? I know you didn't say yes."

Oh gosh. 

"I might have uh ran away."

She laughs, "Holy fuck Dee you did not." I groan, "I panicked ok?"

"Where are you right now?"

"Sitting on a park bench. He asked me like two hours ago."

"Shit Dee and you just bolted. Poor Cole."

"Why?"

She laughs again, "Why? Babe he proposed to his girlfriend and her immediate reaction was to run. Not only that but you'd rather go to a park at night than go back to his apartment. That is a lot of rejection."

I wince. Ok so I am horrible at confrontation. I was so freaked that I didnt think what that did to him. Shoot. 

"I should go talk to him right?"

"Yes bitch, but first what are you going to say?"

What am I going to say? Maybe I should wait to talk to him until tomorrow. 

"I think I should sleep on it." I say and I just know she's rolling her eyes. 

"Whatever sleep on it, but talk to him tomorrow Dee. Also tell me your decision when you make up your mind, and it better be your mind. Don't factor anyone else into the equation. Just think about you and Cole and what is right for your relationship."

I sit there and consider it for a moment. I know I love Cole and if I didnt think people would feel it was rushed I would want to marry him. Clearly Cal doesn't think it's rushed or he would have never given Cole the ok. 

Bailey hasn't exactly said yes I should say yes but she's definitely leaning towards it. I know she wants me to make my own decision. 

With sigh I say, "I do want to marry him." then she squeals so loud I have to move the phone away from my ear. 

"Are you saying yes? Oh my god this is so exciting. Don't get married until I can be there or I swear I will never speak to you again. I can't believe this is happening, little Delilah is getting married." She rambles.

"I haven't even said yes yet."

"But you're going to?" She asks, "Yes I am."

"Ok well go, get off the phone with me and tell the person that matters. NOW."

We say our goodbyes and I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. I also feel my heart beating erratically.