Beyond Redemption

Chapter Eleven

"Sometimes I wish life was written in pencil so we could erase it and write it all over again." - Thisuri Wanniarachchi

Scarlet's POV:

Every day, we make decisions and choices in order to stay in control of our lives. Deciding on the food we eat, the clothes we wear, and how we treat others. 

Throughout the decades, humans have tried to control time, by placing it into more convenient boxes in an attempt to feel in charge. But no matter how many improvements are made in science and technology, one thing humans can never fully control is time.

Time is always moving. It doesn't see influence, wealth, or popularity. It simply goes by each day, waiting for no man or woman. Always moving forward and never backward.

No matter what we do or say, time is and always will be stubbornly behind us.

However here I was in Phoenix's car, desperately wishing I could control time. Wanting nothing more than to go back and change so many things.

Maybe if I had rejected Lia's offer about attending the party then I wouldn't have ran into Jason. Possibly preventing my collapse in the hallway.

Maybe if I had asked my dad to pick me up instead of my mom then I wouldn't have been sitting on a curb in the parking lot for nearly two hours looking like a homeless person. And Phoenix wouldn't have felt obligated to give me a ride.

Maybe if I wasn't so pathetic, I would stop trying to mend my relationship with my mom. Some part of me knew she would bail on me as usual but being the idiot that I was, a tiny part of me buried deep down with the memories of my childhood hoped that she'd remember.

And above all, maybe just maybe if I hadn't gone to that fucking club then I wouldn't have met Phoenix Knight.

He was a strong-willed man, I'll give him that.

Determined to get under my skin, he wanted nothing more than to play with me as though I was a puppet and he, the skillful puppeteer. And I was trying to stand my ground by resisting his charm and efforts but he was pushing.

He was pushing really damn hard.

And in moments like earlier today in the classroom when he had seen me at my most vulnerable, it felt like he was advancing through no man's land. Completely invading my territory.

And the best part...no the worst part was that he handled the situation, effortlessly. Knowing just what to say and how to say it. Understanding what I wanted and when I wanted it.

Everything was done so perfectly and to a T, almost like he experienced and understood what I was going through. The way he calmed me down, knowing what to say to soothe my mind. He knew exactly what to do and how to go about it.

It made me wonder if he himself struggled with similar problems because there was no way in hell that he played it by ear.

If so, what was the onset of his problem?

Honestly, from what I've gathered over the years, Phoenix seemed to have a very nonchalant attitude towards life. Not caring about people's feelings, partying every night, etc. So it came as a shock earlier, when he helped me, seeing as though we barely knew each other.

We were practically strangers.

Nevertheless, I found his act of kindness rather sweet and endearing. My thoughts almost deceived me into thinking he was being genuine.

Almost.

And unfortunately for me the tenderness of his touch and the understanding in his tone was at the forefront of my mind and my body couldn't help but react, my cheeks warming at the thoughts of him.