Beyond Redemption

Chapter Nineteen

"Words can inspire. And words can destroy. Choose yours well." — Robin Sharma

Scarlet's POV

"Hey Mom, I'm going to have a studying session with my tutor," I explained to my mother who was drifting off into a light sleep on the living room couch while the sounds of the television echoed through the house to give the impression that she was watching it.

As of recently, I've realized that there were always these dark circles around her eyes and she was either really tired or constantly dozing off. Her unusual loss of weight didn't go unnoticed either along with her overly sluggish movements.

I didn't pay too much attention to it because she previously had some hard days at work and the divorce was still taking its toll on her. Luckily, she was now on her month-long sabbatical from work, so she was able to rest more. Plus I was way too glad that she was home more often, to even care.

"Okay honey, I'll be resting upstairs if you need me," she said, slowly standing up from the couch, turning off the television, and then making her way up the stairs. But before she got too far, she stopped mid staircase and asked, "Is this tutor a boy?"

The suggestive tone in her voice did not go unnoticed.

"Yes, mother. He is in fact a boy." I emphasized the last part.

"Ok, sweetie. Remember to use protection if things get too intense if you know what I mean." She flashed a smirk before I could inform her that there would be no need to use protection, seeing as though my plan will work.

When she reached the top of the stairs, I heard the chime of the doorbell ring through the house.

Right on time. Thank God.

I hurriedly made my way to the front door before mindlessly glimpsing at my hair in the mirror simultaneously fixing my shirt.

Nowadays I started to care more about my appearance, especially when I knew Phoenix was around. Something about the way he looked at me made me want to put more effort into my look. I wanted him to want me but not be able to have me. I wanted to make him desperate.

Gosh, He really brought out the-- I wasn't even sure whether or not he brought out the best or worst in me. Because hey, if I couldn't fuck him, might as well taunt. No one ever got hurt from teasing.

"Hey Red. I'm early this time." He greeted, wearing one of those smiles that made my heart skip a beat, every time.

He was chewing bubblegum today and I don't know what about him gnawing on a piece of gum that made him look so sexy but it sure as hell had my stomach doing jumping jacks.

He continued nibbling away at the sticky, blue substance as he crossed the threshold, scrutinizing my house.

Something about a person seeing your home for the first time felt too intimate and mundane for my liking, especially in the case of Phoenix and me. He was able to inspect every detail, every flaw, every crevice, and that left me in a state of vulnerability. Something I was trying my best to avoid with these tutor sessions.

Granted we were practically fucking with our clothes on not too long ago in the confines of my bedroom. But that was different. We did those things in the darkest shadows of the night, where no one could see even if they looked. We did those things while under the drunkenness of desire with no care in the world for the consequences of our actions.

But now, here he was in broad daylight, drinking in the decor, furnishings, placement of objects, the color theme with his warm brown eyes void of raging desire that couldn't be contained. Instead, they looked almost welcoming. He stood before me not as Phoenix Knight, the slayer of panties and breaker of hearts but as Phoenix Knight, a man. A man who I yearned to know more about.