A mothers love

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23 years agoAdam was ten months, Jay was four and Will was seven

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23 years ago
Adam was ten months, Jay was four and Will was seven

I had Adam in my arms holding Jays hand. Will was at school. Jay was turning five in a few weeks meaning his going to be starting school after the break. It's the last week of school. "Mummy can we go to the park" Jay looked up at me with his big blue green eyes. He looked so hopeful. "Well we were going to meet up with Camille and Justin" "but that's boring" he groaned out throwing his hands up dramatically "what about I call her seeing if she wants to meet at the park this afternoon" he nods smiling. I go back to holding his hand swing it back and forth causing him to laugh. We walk into the supermarket. I grab a basket, we only had to enough grab enough to fit in a backpack. I immediately walk and grab some milk send Jay to the other side of the aisle (where I can still see him) to grab some bread. We walk around grabbing all different fruits and vegetables along with some meat before walking to the check out and paying. I sit Adam on the table Jay making him laugh and making sure he doesn't try move. I put all our groceries in the bag before placing it securely on my back. Then I pick Adam up and hold Jays hand, we were on our way again.

We decided to take the walk that's a bit longer. Jay was skipping and running around me, holding my hand when we come close to the road or people. Jay was holding my hand talking about all the things he wanted to do when we got home, his wild ideas making me laugh. "Samantha" I stop spinning around seeing someone I never wanted to see again. I hold my two boys a little tighter. I see her eyes glance over the two young boys "they are adorable look like you" I don't reply or loosen by grip on them. They two curious boys watch this lady bewildered "who are you" Jay asks "no one baby" I answer before she can. I wasn't going to let her talk to them. "Let them know us Sam don't be so controlling" she rolls her eyes I wanted to throttle her but alas I couldn't my boys were present. "Controlling and protective are very different you didn't want to know them" I shake my head in utter disgust. "That was before we miss them" "no you miss Will once you let us in he was always your favourite. This one was to wild for your liking" I snap "but get one thing straight mother they are all perfect and will never have to live up to your standards" I snap the protective Mumma bear coming out. "Just give us a chance we have three grandchildren we don't know but what to know" "no you want to clarify that Shawns kids or better and I'm not putting them threw that" I felt my world cracking. The facade I made breaking in her presents. But I couldn't let her see that not in front of my children at least. "We have to go" "wait at least let me get a picture and your number" "no" "Sam" she begged "you are not getting a picture of them and I will rather die than give you my number" I turn and begin to walk down the street glancing back every few steps to see if her or anyone else were following us. "Mummy who was that" I glance behind me as we go to turn down a street towards home. "My mum kiddo" Jays face lights up "why couldn't we meet her is she like grandma" he was talking about Pats mother obviously. That woman is a saint I wonder how on earth she raised the man she did. "She's not like grandma kiddo she's not a nice person which is why mummy keeps you safe and away from her" he nods I can tell his disappointed he love his grandparents. But a moment later his eyes widen "would he hurt Adam" he asks "not when I'm around kiddo they will hurt none of you not you not will not Adam" he nods considering it "good I don't want Will or Adam hurt I love them a lot if they get hurt it hurts me" "it hurts me to buddy" he kisses my hand "I will make it better" I laugh "you always do kiddo you Adam and Will always make it better when I'm sad by just being there" he smiles his big adorable smile up at me making me smile Instantly. Adam starts to babble waving his arms around "I think his telling you he helps as well mummy" I smile "I think he is" I kiss both the heads before walking up the steps to the door unlocking it. Jay runs inside going over to his toys. I place Adam on the floor with toys surrounding him before walking towards the kitchen. I glance over at him before I unpack the groceries to see Jay now sitting with him them playing together. I put the groceries away my mind in a jumble. How could she be so close. If she was here than he was close as well, they always travel together.

Will runs in hours later excited to see me. A lady who lives two doors down has a kid in the same class we alternate who picks them up as we both have younger kids. "Mummy look" he waves a picture in my face. I grab it "that's you daddy Jay and Adam my family" he was so proud of it causing me to smile. I put it on the fridge standing back and admiring it. "It's fantastic Will" he runs off coming back later with Adam in his arms and Jay beside him "look" Will points to the picture proudly showing his brothers. I take Adam out of his arms the ten month old snuggling into me, the kid wasn't light either he loved his food. "That's mummy daddy me that ones you Jay and there's Adam" Will pointed to each both boys standing on a chair "I look so cool" Jay exclaims jumping up and down "that's cause your cool" Will shrugs Jay hugs will "I love it" I smile seeing how despite not wanting a hug he lets his little brother. Jay worships Will everything Will has or does Jay wants. He just has to get the concept that Will is bigger so he can do more but the kid despite being four is very stubborn and committed. If he wants he will achieve. Will is a loving caring big brother, he adores his little brothers. Jay more than Adam, I'm hoping when Adam is older the adoration will grow. Adam is still little. Jay and Adam are are team spending everyday together while Will goes to school. Jay adores his brothers both of them. He wanted to be a good big brother to Adam, the kid was made to a big brother just not a middle child. They were grounding me. Making me relax after today, after the traumatic memories of the past plague my mind. I know I will hold them a little tighter, a little closer to my heart for a while.

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