Mia Regina

Chapter 7

Lorenzo D'Amelio

My shoes click against the tiles indicating my presence and the whole room goes quiet and suddenly develops a tense surrounding. All the guards hang their heads down when my gaze moves to them. Everyone in my way disperses sideways allowing me to walk forward. I unbutton my suit slowly keeping my gaze ahead of me.

Losing my necktie I watch some girl's eyes on me as I walk towards the stairs. They all scurry away and hang their heads down once noticing the glare I sent them. I exit the hallway and hurry down the stairs in fast movements. I shrug my suit off in-process and hang it over my arm. One of the guards who spots me immediately rushes to open the door.

I enter the door and a strong smell of blood, sweat and tears hits me. Screams and pleas fill my ears making me close my eyes in annoyance. I look around to see multiple chambers and guards near them looking extra alert due to my presence.

"Where's Matteo?" I ask one of the guards who looks about to pass out.

"Sixth c-chamber capo." [Boss] He says while stuttering.

I close my eyes in annoyance then remember what my mamma [mom] said yesterday. With a single nod, I pass him heading towards the chamber.

Just as I enter I watch Matteo standing before the guy who doesn't even look identical to the person I saw ten hours ago. Matteo's hands drip blood but I know that it isn't his. Putting my coat on a table I start rolling up my sleeves before sitting on the chair beside Matteo. I spread my legs and grab a joint from my pocket, I place it between my lips and light it up the whole time my eyes not leaving the guy who's shivering.

"Capo-" he starts speaking only to be cut off by me.

"Cazzo ti ho permesso di parlare?" [Did I fucking allow you to speak?] I ask in a deep voice removing the joint from my mouth. He shakes his head and a pathetic whimper escapes him making me smirk. "You should have fucking thought about the consequences before you tried to betray me," I say while clenching my jaw.

"I-I'm sorry." He apologizes making me chuckle darkly.

"Isn't it too late now?" I ask while raising an eyebrow. He shakes his head repeatedly apologizing. "Who?" I asked Matteo without turning my head in his direction.

"Leonid." He replies without any emotion making me clench my jaw even tighter. Without thinking much I take my gun from the back pocket and just as I was about to shoot him he starts speaking.

"P-Please, I have a pregnant wife and a k-kid. P-Please Don don't do this." He begs making me pause. I halt suddenly and my breathing starts to quicken. Before I let my emotions take over me I shoot him right between his eyes.

"Send some money to his family," I mutter before heading out while grabbing my jacket and not looking at Matteo knowing well that he would hate me even more if I was around him for some more time.

I climb up the stairs and the chattering sound immediately stops, I don't blame them, to be honest, it was me who shot twenty-five people of my men since I couldn't control my anger. I did get an hour lecture from my mother yesterday but I zoned out after ten minutes.

With a heavy sigh, I head out to my car and enter it. I drop my suit onto the seat beside me and put my head on the steering wheel. My mind runs with various emotions and one being the most prominent regret. I bite my lip and inhale deeply when I feel all my walls crumbling down.

A phone ring breaks me out of my impending emotional breakdown. I quickly pick it up once I see the caller ID.

"Mamma?" I answer the phone in a soft tone, completely different to the one I use towards the outsiders.

"Figlio, your father and I have someone to meet so we'll be joining you at the dinner. Don't worry about us and riposa." [Son, take rest] she warns.

"Sì signora." [Yes madam] I mock and her small chuckle instantly lifts the corner of my lips. There's nothing more I want than to keep my mother happy.

"Ti amo, Figlio." [I love you son] she says making my heart warm.

"Ti amo anche io mamma." [I love you too mom] I whisper and hang the phone call.

With a sigh, I drive towards my mansion resting a hand on the window and another on the wheel. It takes me about fifteen minutes to reach the destination and I immediately step out and head into it. When I reach my room my face falls and all the tough boy act I've been keeping up penetrates.

There was no one to wrap arms around and kiss me as soon as I enter, there was no one laying on the bed completely naked waiting for me to worship the body. There was no one to cuddle into, no one to show my emotions and vulnerability to.

There was no one.

There was no Valentina.

The name itself brings so many memories, all good ones except one. The one which I everyday despise myself for. There was no one to blame but me. No one. A tear slips past my eyes making me scoff lowly. "Pathetic," I whisper to myself and enter the shower. Even though these memories kill me they are the reason I'm alive. They give me the strength to keep going.

Water trickles down my body making me close my eyes. I imagine my sweet Val peppering kisses all over my body, massaging my hair, playfully nibbling my earlobe. It was the side she only showed to me and somehow I managed to fuck it up, like always.

Heaving a sigh I clean myself and wrap a towel around my waist getting out of the bathroom. I wear black ripped jeans and a black shirt and look at myself in the mirror. Eyes red due to crying, an eyebrow which has a scar to it cutting it slightly. The piercing near my eyebrow adds another dark look to my face. When I lick my lips another piercing comes into view, the one which Val loved.

Even though I knew I looked good I can't help but feel pathetic. I am actually pathetic. Losing Val was my biggest loss but I swear, it wasn't intentional. I want to tell her everything, each and everything that happened in my life before.

Val and I were never good on the communication part, another reason why our relationship tumbled so easily. She would never tell me about her and I would never tell her about mine. Of course, I wanted to know everything about her but I'll be a hypocrite because I didn't want to tell her anything about my past. And it was just three years since I married her back then. One year went in ignoring each other, another went in getting close and another went in loving each other. Just when I thought everything was fine, I fucked up. Big time.

One chance, it's all I ask for.

Sighing again I grab my mask and my car keys before heading out to that place. It was the only where I could feel free again, free from all the emotional stress, regret, pain, everything.