Collection Of Eclectic Poems From An Introverted Mind.

The silence

Many people find comfort in silence, declaring it to be peaceful and serene.

 I find noise to be blissful because for me it behaves like a screen. 

The fine line between my white soul and dark thoughts that always await the opportunity to intervene.

I never feel more alone then I do in silence. The darkness in my mind only seems to get louder when there's no distracting sound to crowd it out. It starts to spread over the surface of my brain, seeping through the nooks and crannies making sure it leaves no area untainted.Leaving me defenseless to the overwhelming reality of being trapped all alone with my thoughts in complete silence. 

The suppressed thoughts and emotions that reside in the blackness all begin to emerge and conjoin during the silence - morphing into an alternate version of myself. One with the qualities I both despise and envy. Cynical, sinister, brave, unapologetic and most importantly confident. This doppelgänger within me being everything I've ever avoided or ever wished to be, staring at me with such disdain.

 As if I was the anomaly in this upside down universe it lived in. As if i wasn't worthy to be the one to control our brain. It says nothing but continues to stare me down with a twisted grin on its face.

 Before it can begin to communicate I frantically rush to drown out the silence with meaningless noise. Sweet and blissful noise. All of these feelings may happen within just a few seconds in the real world but in the upside down world it seems to unravel painfully slow. 

The torturous stare of alternate me lingering on my mind, until I'm able to numb every molecule of my being. Leaving all the complexities of being a higher being paused in a zone of indifference and nonchalantness. In that brief moment my anxieties are slightly alleviated . Giving me the fleeting moment of undoubted confidence in myself . Relief gradually starts washing over me like a gentle tide, swaying my body to peace.