Insomniacs (#1)

54. ezekiel

song that I listened to whilst writing. it suits pretty well, i think - I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Miya Folick.

enjoy this rollercoaster of emotions :)

The evening air was crisp and bitter. It was cold enough for every exhale to condense into a wistful fog. For goosebumps to make their place along my back. For Luca's body and coat to hold me against him on this rooftop.

We were in a pretty risky position. Sat on a wide ledge that came up to about our stomach when we were standing. Me sat in front of him between his legs, his arms secured around me and face tucked into my shoulder. Our legs dangled together, mine between his.

"What is this place?" I asked, lying my head back on his shoulder.

He hadn't said much about where we were going or why we were here. He just parked up outside of this spot, greeted the elderly waitresses who seemed to be acquainted with him from the way they guffawed and pinched his cheeks and hugged him for a good ten minutes, before he led us up the narrow staircase to this barren rooftop.

We looked upon a small, deprived town. Most of the shop buildings looked about ready to collapse, neon signs dead or blinking or half missing. Ragged barbed wire around parks or most sparse fields. It seemed pretty impoverished, I could see a few homeless people lying on the streets or scrounging for food. Alongside the shadow of the clouds, everything seemed gloomy.

"This-" He nestled into my neck more, "This is the shithole I grew up in and that-" He lifts his arms, points to a small house a street or so away from where we are, "You see it?"

I nodded and he speaks, "That's the house I grew up in."

"You grew up here?" I turned over my shoulder to look at him. He met my eyes, his bruises prominent and lip busted yet somehow, he was just as beautiful as I've always found him.

"I used to come here a lot more often. When I'd miss mom. This diner we're on top of, she used to work here. Me and Miguel would come here straight after school, spend our evenings in a small booth or we'd come up to this roof. It was back when I liked heights, my fear hadn't begun back then. On her breaks, she'd come up and join us. Sit between us on here." He told me and I listened to the calm rasp of his voice.

"After she died, I'd sneak away from the orphanage at night. Sometimes I'd take Miguel with me but most times, I went myself." He said and I rest my arms over where he was holding me, around my torso.

"When I first started boxing. I came here. I couldn't sit on the ledge anymore because I'd feel a panic attack coming on so I'd just walk around, keep my back turned to the drop. When the orphanage was too much. I'd escape here. When I first met Everest and he pissed me off and wouldn't leave me alone." He said and I couldn't help my little laugh.

It hurt my chest to think about Luca as a small kid. Sitting on this ledge, swinging his legs alone and missing his only person, his mom. He's gone through so much.

"When I first got out of Juvie. That's why I was late to that party, I was up here smoking. And when-" He cuts himself off. He was silent for a moment so I looked back to him.

We both exhaled when we met eyes, the small cloud of steam leaving our lips in unison and colliding with with each other between our lips, "When?"

He was silent again. Deadly quiet and just looking at me. I was familiar to him gazing upon my features like he was memorising them. It was nothing new, something routinely to the two of us.

"When I first met you." He said.

"Our first encounter wasn't the best, darling." I winced in remembrance of the bruise I left on his jaw.