Sub Liminal

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Hoo boy, it's been a while, hasn't it? So, I promise I definitely have an explanation for this massive unannounced leave of absence. I just haven't been in a good headspace since the last thing I posted here, and I've just been feeling real shitty for the longest time. But I'm feeling better now, with the help of a certain friend of mine who will go unnamed, though he knows who he is. So hopefully now I can get back into a routine, and actually get shit out.

Oh, and just a heads up. This oneshot serves as a sort of prequel for one later down the line. When that one will be coming out? I couldn't tell you, all I know is that it will be coming out before November. I do have some more things planned, but you'll just have to wait and see to find out. But anyways, that is all, hope you enjoy!

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November 30th, 20██

Alright, let's just get this shit over and done with. Apparently this is the only option I have left. Couldn't have just been more time in the loony bin, no, I have to write a goddamn journal this time. I guess I'm not insane enough for that place anymore anyways, so at least I get to keep my shoes while I write this.

Hi, my name is Lucas. And if that opening paragraph is any indicator, you already know what type of book this is gonna be. Yeah, alright, this is gonna get old quick. My therapist told me to write like someone is gonna be reading this, when we all know they're probably just gonna flip this shit into some textbook 10 years from now after I inevitably end up killing myself.

Yeah, I've been in and out of several different insane asylums and funny farms. And no, I'm not one of those insufferable assholes who considers those terms slurs or whatever. After actually being in them myself, yeah, the names fit. Especially this one I went to upstate, I think I actually saw a man eat his own dick off there.

But now, I should be cured. At least that's what the doctors have been telling me. One thing I do know, however, is that I stopped self-harm. So that's good. But that wasn't even the reason I was in those places, apparently I've been exhibiting what the doctors like to call "An unhealthy mental state." Which I mean, yeah, fair. I did do...Something that did warrant me being thrown in there. But I regret it with my entire being. I don't regret much, but that one thing...You don't know what I would give to undo it.

I'm a complete recluse, like I don't even leave the house. I mainly do online school, which I must say, there is a surprising lack of making sure you're not cheating in those classes. I somehow got a 95 average and no one, not even my parents, batted an eye. I guess it makes sense, seeing as my brother, Claus, is pretty smart. Especially with tech and math and such. He'll probably go into the STEM field, while I'll be stuck working at some shithole fast food joint with Bubba as my boss, barking at me to clean the fat shit he just took in the toilet.

But there is something that I do know that I'm good at. Puzzles, hoo boy do I love me a good puzzle. There's just something I love about finding patterns, and then using those patterns to unravel a web of clues that leads me to an eventual solution is just so satisfying. I haven't done many puzzles, however, since...Nevermind.

So yeah, uh, that's about it. Man, this is weirder than I thought. But I guess I have to do it, otherwise shit will happen that I just really don't want to deal with right now. See ya tomorrow.

November 31st

God, I hate people. More accurately, I hate kids. Not like young kids, kids my own age. Teenagers. The worst of the worst. They're all so arrogant and loud. They think they're the shit, and that everyone loves them. Little do they know that as soon as people see teenagers in public, they all collectively roll their eyes. I think all teenagers should have to go to jail for just a month, just to show them what the real world is really like. And so that they'll finally stop being public nuisances.

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