The Girl On The Cam

Chapter-1

Inspired from Euphoria (because I'm currently watching the series and Zendaya fucking owns my ass)

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It's a hot summer day in California and even the air conditioning in my house isn't able to combat the heat. Since it's summer break before I start college and most of my friends are out of the country on some lavish vacations on foreign islands, I sit in my room twiddling my thumbs.

Looking out of the window, I wonder if I should go to the beach but my sensitive pale skin could hardly handle the sun burn two days in a row.

Euphoria plays in the background on the laptop, some scene with Nate and Maddy on the screen. I've already watched the show once but out of sheer boredom, I am rewatching it. The fact that I'm horny as fuck doesn't help either. I am going to be a freshmen in college but I've literally never had sex. Not that there's anything wrong with it, but I just really wanted to, you know?

I've only ever had one boyfriend in 9th grade and we quickly broke up after he discovered that I was unwilling to have sex with him. I wasn't really ready back then in 9th grade. But I think I am now. Or maybe I think so.

See, in my head sex looked like this great thing but when I was actually presented the opportunity to have sex, I  freaked out and kicked the guy in the face when he landed on top of me.

After that, I pretty much gave up on the idea of having sex in real life. It just wasn't for me, atleast until the right person came along.

I've always been the girl that was never enough of one thing.

Not enough beautiful, not enough ugly.

Not enough skinny, not enough curvy.

Not enough straight, not enough gay.

Not enough smart, not enough dumb.

My life is literally just a continous sequence of not-enoughs. Add to that my over achieving older siblings. My brother is currently studying law at Yale and my sister is getting a business degree from Princeton. And then comes me. The never enough youngest sibling that could never even come close to achieving what my older siblings have. I didn't have grades enough to get into Ivy league. Berkeley would have to do it for me.

My parents are always busy, traveling to different states and cities for their business. I am not even sure what they actually do really. They've always been out for as long as I can remember and I was mostly brought up by my older sister, Cassie. With her gone to uni, I've constantly felt neglected in the house and hence why my partying has increased in the past year. I wanted any excuse to get out of the house that felt like a prison.

I unlock my phone and surf through reddit, hoping atleast some memes would distract me for a while.

That is when my eyes land on this new post by one of this account that I recently followed.

She has answered a question that she claims she is frequently asked in her dms.

Why did you decide to do webcams for OnlyCams?

Wait, I have no idea she does that. Its not like it matters anyway. Its a free world, you do you, Queen.

But her question does quip my curiosity.

I don't know what gave me the idea honestly. I can't really remember. I started doing it 3 years ago. Mostly because I was a broke university student and my parents could no longer afford to pay my tuition. I was working 2 part-time jobs and my studies were seriously suffering from that. So I needed something to earn cash fast. It's not a sob story really because I realised how much I loved doing that. How it turned me on knowing there were all these people getting turned on just by my pictures. OnlyCams happened eventually. Loved the live chats and people appreciating my body. The cash was awesome not gonna lie. Quit both my jobs and did 2 sessions a day. Even started personal video sessions and my customers paid a lot of money for that. People really have all that spare money to throw seriously. Anyway I completed my degree last year and got a job right after but I still love doing this. Extra money never hurts, bitches. And also the fact that noone at my job knows about this and the whole secrecy thing really turns me on. There, I hope that answers your questions once and for all. Don't forget my OnlyCams tonight at 10.

That is one honest answer. No bullshit, no sappy drama, just the simple truth.

But I guess, on an internet platform where noone knows who you are, being honest is easy.

My mind has a mind of its own, the one that I don't and can't control and right now, its coming up with ideas I don't think I should be coming up with.

What if...

NO.

No, listen Amber-

I SAID NO MIND OF MIND

No one will ever know. Think about it, you be finally have the attention that you wanted. Have people getting turned on by you, wanting you.

Hah, funny how you think I'm capable of turning even the furniture on, let alone a living, breathing person.

We'll neve know if we never try.

No, Amber don't even consider it. No. Whatever, fuck it!

I'm not going to be 18 forever. And I have an entire 3 months of summer to do nothing but bore my brain out in this big empty house. Trying won't hurt.

Throwing caution to the fucking wind (or in my case, semi-cold stale air conditioner breeze), I type in the OnlyCams address into the search bar and wait for the page to load.

Let's get this show on the road.

It should scare me really, because once its on the internet, you can never have it back. But I've been too cautious my entire life but what have I achieved from it.

Not a single thing.

I don't know if this is exactly the time to be so reckless, when I'm standing on the brink of a new beginning. In college I can be who ever I choose to be. The high school shadows are no longer going to follow me.

Do I really want to risk that over some experiment thing just because I'm lonely and bored?

I've always been impulsive, my sister says that's my biggest flaw, because I don't think about the consequences of my actions. But I tried to take the overthinking path and it has led me nowhere, probably only added to be self loathing and misery.

Its not like anyone has the right to judge me. Everyone has skeletons in their closets that they'll never expose to the world. And no matter how hard you try to pretend you're an epitome of innocence, no one in this fucking world is.

And a little experiment never hurt anyone.

Or did it?

*********

*drumroll*

*pepepepepeeppepepepepe* (weird welcome rally sound)

I just completed watching Baby on Netflix (an Italian tv series) and started Euphoria. And I was like, wait what if these two could be connected.

And *BAM*

I get this random idea last night and here it is.

Excited to share this with you all.

What do you think about either shows if you've watched them? And if you haven't, give it a try tbh.

And what do you think about the chapter? Let me know.

Until next chap, keep things freaky my horny people