The Girl On The Cam

Chapter-19

We talked for hours. Well technically, 2 hours but it seemed to me like it was a few minutes. Time with Lauren went by so fast.

As I drive back to my house in the evening, I can't help but think about her. Talking to her came naturally and that's coming from someone who's introverted that I wouldn't even ask people to move if they were standing in my way.

She is easy going and calm and mature and everything that is good and perfect. Honestly I'm yet to find one thing about that women that's less then perfect. Although she assured me several times that there were many.

It's just hard to believe that someone who is so older than me would be able to understand me so well. It was like she knew exactly what I wanted to say.

She told me she's been on the website for several years now and she doesn't really do personal sessions which I found hard to believe because she was so natural at it. She's divorced and her ex-wife lives in Florida. Lauren is a lesbian but she completely understood my need to not put labels on my sexuality. She said I have many years to figure it out and even if I didn't, there's nothing wrong with it. There was just something comforting about people understanding exactly what you feel.

We also exchanged numbers and agreed to keep in touch. I don't know why that gives me a giddy feeling in my tummy.

Reaching home, I order a Hawaiian Pizza because I'm starving and put on Twilight, which apparently seems to be my comfort movie.

Halfway through the atrocity that is the Twilight Saga, my mind flips back to the moment I saw Lauren emerge from the water like some ocean goddess. Almost in the same second, my mind reels back to Aiden and his confession. Aiden liked me and I definitely liked him back then why am having all these thoughts about a woman I just met?

Is it attraction? Lust? I don't know. It all seems a little too confusing to me honestly. I wish I could ask someone for advice. Cassie, my older sister, gives such great advices but if I tell her that I'm crushing on a woman thats almost 10+ years older than me, she might just pop an artery and come all the way back to California just to yell some sense into me. And God forbid, my elder brother, Josh, gets a whiff of this. They are both so protective of me they'll probably so berserk. Its great having people who care about you even though they're thousands of miles away.

Coming back to my Aiden thoughts, I'm still confused as to what the explanation of this unequivocal attraction towards an anonymous woman is.

Maybe because she's so perfect that it should be against the law?

Not helping.

If I genuinely liked Aiden, I shouldn't be having these thoughts about her, right? Or maybe not. Maybe I should call my sister and make up some imaginary scenario to get her advice but she'll never stop nagging me until I fess up.

It's a cliff either way.

I text Lauren. It's just a simple hi because I'm afraid I might end up looking like a desperate teenager, which I am honestly but I want to be the kind of mature person someone like Lauren is attracted to.

Why do you care if Lauren is attracted to you?

Just because.

Her reply comes in agonizing seven minutes. Seven minutes that I spent considering that I shouldn't have texted first.

Lauren:
Hello, love
Missing me already?

She sounds so cocky really but her confidence is what attracted me to her in the first place. She's so self assured its like a breath of fresh air. In a world filled with women that are made to feel insecure because of some stupid standards society set, it's always a pleasure meeting someone who says 'fuck these standards' and lives life on their own terms. But it's also easy when that someone looks the way Lauren does.