Heathens & Hand Grenades (Book 1 of the Heathens Duet)

Chapter 30- Riggs

Between Dario's intel bomb, Kace's fucking tantrum, and Calista's story, I am in desperate need of a drink. Or five. The faint burn of Calista's concoction, because it only vaguely resembled any known version of a Hot Toddy, has faded and I'll be damned, but my throat feels better than in has in months. I'll have to reward her for being such a good girl.

         Telling Kace about our connection to Calista was a gamble, but we have no secrets between us. Never have. Eventually he would've put the pieces together himself, once the fiery haze of his anger had a moment to dissipate. The walk did him good. Honestly both of us needed the fresh air. It's a calculated risk being out in the open, but Kace's family is our only worry this far out. The Hamilton's may own my family's land now, but they don't know it. Not like Kace and I do. Dario's done some of his best work hiding all traces of this place on any scans. Thermal imaging was the biggest challenge, but he looked like a kid in the candy store when I presented the task to him. We're now hidden behind an invisibility cloak according to him. Not my expertise, not my place to question. My team know what they're doing and I trust them to it. With my life. 

         I'm just tired. Kace took it all better than I expected, but that in itself is giving me pause. I expected more of a fight. More arguing, just more. There's something off about his reaction.  Maybe after lunch and a nap, it'll come to me.

The crushing weight of responsibility, not only for myself and my brothers, but now Calista too, has been heavy. It was impulsive of me to insist on taking her with us. On that point, Kace was right. But I know if I falter on that, he'll run with it and question all of my decisions where she's concerned and I can't allow that. 

         I don't think her recognizing us is an issue. Kace looks pretty much the same as back then. Bulked out, buzzed head, and beard aside, only his attitude has changed. The Kace from her memories was quick to smile, slow to anger. Now anger is all he shows her. She has no clue. It was blatant in the way she spoke, zero recognition for either of us. I get it. Just a ghost of the boy I was in her memories is all she'll find now. My beard and hair have grown, but the scar on my neck did more than just ruin my voice. It ruined the cocky invincibility that I was so convinced I had.

         Hard to feel invincible when you can't even call for help as you watch your life's blood leak out.

         Inhaling a deep breath brings me back to now. No need to sink myself into the depths of depression. It'll come for me either way, no need to usher it in like an honored guest.

         I can practically taste the sandwich I plan to throw together before I get started breaking down the two rabbits Kace caught in his traps. It's not much, but it helps to limit our supply runs.

         Dealing with everything always makes me hungry. What I wouldn't do for some of Gram's cooking right about now.

No use dwelling on things that can't be changed.

Unlocking the bunker and heading in I'm struck by the sense that something's off. I slow my steps and take in the scene before me with a tactical eye. Dried blood flakes off Calista's skin, bite marks too, and she keeps squirming in her seat, looking across the room. Which brings me to Jax.

Fuck.

No need to guess where the blood came from. He looks pleased by it, not pissed. Though there's little way to tell with him. Normally he would've scrubbed this place with a toothbrush at the first sign of dirt and bathed himself till the water ran cold. Not now. He wears the blood like a badge of honor and his hands are bare of his leather gloves.

"Have a good walk? I'm sure it was illuminating," he says, eyes flashing as he laughs, taking another slow sip of his drink. He knows damn well what this looks like and I'm praying I'm wrong. None of our moral compasses are pointing to true north and Jax's compass is a bit wonkier than others, but I don't want to even think about it skewing that far south.