meant to be yours | d.w

42

"We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others, that in the end, we become disguised to ourselves"

September 3rd, 1963

"Tell me she means nothing to you."

I wasn't even able to make it through a week of school before I was caught right in the act. After school, I met her. I met her amid the chaos of the transition the United States was going through. The chaos we wanted to escape from.

It was then that he caught me. Right in his cruiser.

He promptly drove me home, staying completely silent for the duration of the ride home. But there was only four words he spoke that truly had an impact on me. Four words that made me shrink back into my seat.

"What were you thinking?"

But alas, he carried on with his worrisome behavior. For he largely feared for what would become of his daughter if he allowed herself to turn away from everything she had. He had given her the world, why was she not satisfied?

"There are people out there bigger and stronger than you, they could have taken you down in minutes."

"All that to threaten your safety?"

So here we are, sitting at the kitchen table, my father staying stern, yet keeping that familiar warmth in his eyes. Marie Davis always hated playing the bad guy. But ironically enough, her father left her no choice.

"Tell me, that's all you have to do, that she means nothing to you." Her mother repeated.

Rebecca didn't utter a word. She only crossed her arms, looking down. "We're just friends." She muttered.

Marie sighed. "Darling, you can't mix in with that group. It's a matter of principle. Do you know what this would do to you? To your future?"

"Her kind just isn't who we mix with. That's how it is with all of em." Her father added in. "You don't see Mexicans and Asians going around mingling do you?"

This need for perfection would eventually drive the family into madness. For this desire only overshadowed their ability to maintain normality, the need to keep everything they have intact. They were so lucky, they were so close. They only needed their kids to be what they had expected them to be from the beginning.

But life is full of surprises. And it may not be clear, but it is what reigns truth. For every family has secrets that they would prefer to keep on the down low.

Time went on, but the stubbornness the family members preceded them, leading the argument to take over the duration of the evening.

Rebecca cried like she was a little girl again that night. Whenever Rebecca looks back on these few months where she grew unsure of her decisions, she always wonders why she was so naive. For she chose to believe that her father was good at heart, she decided that maybe her parents really did have good intentions.

She still likes to believe people are good at heart.

Her vision is just more tainted.

Present Day

Mary. That was her name.

Mary was the name of the girl who sent an imaginary message inside my head. The girl who flooded every blood vessel with a girl I remember as my past. I hardly knew what was going on, and my current state wasn't the best, but it was then that I knew she had something to weigh on me that I might not want to admit to.