Things have indeed gotten better since the last couple days but there is still this fear inside of me.
I don't know but I just can't help this feeling of unease in my chest, I feel like something is going to happen. Whether it is a good or a bad thing? I don't know. I felt arms wrap around me. Encasing me in shield of warmth, safety and dare I say, love.
"What is my precious baby thinking?" Calvin asked kissing my cheek
"I just have this feeling in my chest, like something is going to happen. I just don't know what to do." I sighed looking in the mirror in front of me
"No matter what happens, I will stay by your side. Don't worry, just relax a little. I know you worry but stressing and worrying so much is not good for your health." Calvin said looking back at me through the mirror
"I want to go out. I'm bored staying in here. Though you let me practice, there's nothing else to do. I have done everything on my laptop; planning and etc. I want some fresh air." I said twisting in his arms so that I was facing him and looking at him with a pouty face
"How can I ever say no to you when you have that look going about you? Now, how about we go to the café nearby?" Calvin gave in instantly
"That works for me." I said beaming with joy and little bit of pride, knowing that Calvin will pretty much do everything and anything to make me the happiest girl alive.
Just that fact alone makes me feel like one of the luckiest girls to have been born. To have someone who dotes on me so much, makes me feel like I'm his entire world. To have someone who doesn't ever stop or tire from letting me know that he cares and loves me, even though it may not be true or real. Even though this may be fake, even when I don't deserve it. Calvin never makes me feel anything but safe and loved. I know that someday, he will tire himself out trying to always take care of me and deal with me. I just hope that it later rather than sooner. I know that I have just too much of a baggage; anxiety, PTSD most likely, depression to some extent and separation anxiety most definitely. I'm anorexic and always need someone to make sure I'm having enough food, always encouraging me to eat more so, I can start taking normal meals again. Time and time again, reassuring me about the same little things that find their way in my thoughts.
Someday, it will get too tiring. Someday, Calvin will get tired of me. I'm sure of it.
"Chocolates for your thoughts?" Calvin smiled
"Just mindless musings but I'll still take the chocolate." I answered removing myself from my self destructive thoughts
"I would like to know a bit of your utterly mindless musings." Calvin urged
Sometimes, there's no winning against him.
"Will you ever get tired of me?" I asked
"Of course not." Came his instantaneous answer
"Don't lie to me. Anyone is bound to get tired of my baggage and I. Just a burden, is all I am. Someday, you'll stop doing all these lovely things for me and I don't think I'll ever be able to bear that when it happens." I sighed
"This so called burden and baggage happens to be the person I'm in love with. Nothing but perfection in my eyes, is all you're going to be. As for all the things I do for you, if I forget then remind me, as long as you want me to hold you like this, tell me but if there ever comes a day when you no longer want to do something then don't keep it in your heart and hurt yourself more. No other, I love as much as I love you. That one smile from you is the reason for my existence, the essence of my very being is fueled by that smile of yours. I never want to be the one you fake it to." Calvin said holding my chin, making me look at him
YOU ARE READING
Hated Lover
Teen Fiction"I felt eyes on me yet... again. I looked up to see her staring at me. She immediately looked away when she saw that I had caught her staring at me. I truly do not understand her problem. She is always staring at me. Sometimes, she creeps me out to...
