I Can't Stop Even If It's Wrong!!

Chapter 5

Louis's POV:

Shit!! Shit!!! Shit!!!! No! I did not just do that!

I get up from the bed quickly, trying to find a shirt to wear, since, i was half naked. I was sweaty but I didn't care. I felt exposed and I had to cover myself up. I found a grey t-shirt and started putting it on. I felt Harry's eyes on me the whole time, watching me and my every move. Once I had my shirt on, I turn around and tell him,

"This didn't happen! You Understand!?"

I can see and feel the confusion in his eyes. I don't know why I did this. Why I had the urge to kiss Him. It shouldn't have happened. I blame Zayn and Liam for that! Their dirty and sexual innuendos and flirting  must have riled me up! How is that even possible? I am not even gay, or bi! But to be honest, I have also never kissed a girl before, much less slept with them. But that doesn't make me gay.....does it? All these thoughts went through my head as I desperately tried to avoid eye-contact with Harry, rummaging through my drawers, not even trying to find anything of importance. I just didn't want to look at the red-lipped, sweaty, flushed, emerald-eyed boy.

I heard Harry shuffling about the bed but I didn't turn, knowing that if I did, I would feel the need to explain or do something. And finally, I hear the door shut. I take a sigh of relief and lean down on the bed on my back with one arm tucked under my head, staring at the roof of my room but thinking about Harry.

The fuck!?!? Why am I thinking about him!? It was just a heated moment! Snap out of it Louis! And besides, Harry didn't even complain. He just accepted what you said. 'That it didn't happen'. You can too accept that Tommo!

I closed my eyes in satisfaction. I had stopped thinking about Harry, but it lasted only for a moment. Now, i was thinking about how his lips were so soft and plump. They tasted salty and sweet. How he just followed wherever I lead him. How he would be a good submiss-

What. The. Hell. Louis. !!!!???

My eyes shot open at that thought. My breathing was a little heavier.

Why would you think about that? This is so wrong! You don't even know the guy, and now you are imagining him on his knees for you? That's not how it works....right? Ofcourse it doesn't! You have already made a terrible mistake by snogging him! My Mistake? Screw that! It was his fault! He should have stayed downstairs and mind his own business. And well, he didn't, so he got punished for it.... somewhat!

I turned to my side, staring blankly at a corner, thinking, how will I face him tomorrow?

I wasn't sleepy, so, I opened my phone and started playing games to distract myself.

I sighed when I heard my stomach growling. I hadn't eaten anything since i got the news, so, I get up from my bed to go downstairs to get myself to eat something, but my hand stopped right upon the door knob. What if he is downstairs? What will I do then? I slowly opened my door and peaked outside at the hallway, that was thankfully empty. I made my way to Harry's room and leaned my ear on the door to listen. I heard nothing, so, I half-opened the door slowly and saw Harry sleeping. Words can't describe how relieved I was right now. I closed the door and made my way downstairs. I was about to get a packet of chips out from the lower shelf, when I saw mum and Dan come in the living room. They weren't holding hands or cuddling with each other, Thank God!

To be honest, I find all this hand holding, cheek kissing, cuddling or touching waists, quite nauseating. Just keep it simple and distant...right? Mum walks over to me for a hug and I just slide down the couch, away from her. I still haven't forgotten about the stunt she had pulled.

"Don't fill up on chips Louis, I am making dinner" she says, putting on the apron and tying her hair.

"Really? Why bother?" I mutter to myself as I start eating the chips in my hand.

After sometime, I finally smell the delicious smell of pasta and spaghetti.

"Dinner's ready!" Mum yells from the dining table, setting all the spoons and plates on the table.

I stand up normally, trying to look like I wasn't waiting for a whole hour just to hear those words. I finally sit down at my table and pick up the spaghetti bowl, when my mother immediately stops me.

"Go, get Harry" she says normally, adjusting the napkins and glasses for all the four of us.

I gulp. I don't want to. Why is she asking me? Can't she just yell his name?

"Louis!? Did you not hear what I said?" Her voice was not stern or angry. She was just making sure if I heard her.

"Yes, I did mother. I did hear you. But I am choosing not to act on it." I think in my head, eyeing the pasta bowl near my plate. I just want to eat my food! Please save me Lord!

"It's okay, I will get him" Dan said, getting up from his chair, giving us a small smile. I silently thanked Dan and immediately dug in.

"Slow down Hon. If you keep eating at this pace, you would choke on the food" Mum said, obviously worried at how abnormally fast I was eating.

I know mum that I could choke, but you don't understand. I cannot be here when Harry shows up. I won't be able to breathe if he sat near me.

I finished my meal within minutes and mum was shocked. I quickly get up, put my plate in the sink, wash my hands and go upstairs. Usually i would wish good night to mum, but not today. I am still angry at her, even though the food she made was heavenly. My pace slows down as I was about to reach the hallway, hoping, to not bumping into Harry. And when I found the hallway empty, I quickly make my way into my room and lock the door.

I brushed my teeth, took off my shirt and got under the duvet. I picked up my phone, set an alarm for tomorrow and then, put my phone back on the nightstand. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "Tomorrow's gonna be wild!"

How's it coming so far!?