I Can't Stop Even If It's Wrong!!

Chapter 19

Harry's POV:

Shit! I did not just ask that!!!!!!!!

"You want me to touch you where exactly?" Louis smirked asking me, towering over me with our face inches away from each other as he planted both his hands on either side of my head.

Where do u think dickhead? I glared at him.

"No- nowhere- i- I" I stuttered, trying to hide my face from the direct gaze of Louis's piercing blue eyes.

"I didn't mean that!- u know what, we should go back to our places- i- " I tried to slip away from underneath Louis because this was way too embarassing to be fixed. U don't ask a complete dickhead like Louis, to get u off like that.

But before I could do anything to leave, he ducked down and kissed me. In that moment, my body felt limp like i had no control over it. His lips felt so soft and euphoric to taste. I felt like i was high without the pills, just from his lips and the way his beard scratched my chin, all the strength I had collected to leave died right there. I knew I was getting carried away because of our kiss, but my eyes refused to open and my mind rejected the idea of slipping away as something vague and disrespectful, even though a few seconds ago, that same thought felt well-constructed and necessary.

His lips were overpowering my entire stance as he kept leaning and leaning more into me, burying me deeper in the sheets slowly like the mist slowly clouds the mountains.

God, I don't want to leave his lips.

After getting my head, thoroughly buried in the pillow, he stopped kissing me. I chased his lips for only a fraction of a second so as to not show him I was still craving his lips on me.

"U want me to touch you?" He asked in a raspy voice, stroking my sides.

His gaze was fixed at me and I didn't know how long before I drown and give in. I gulped hard. My thoughts were springing around like in a bounce house and nothing was making sense to me.

"I- I don't know why I asked that.." I managed to mumble amidst my deep flustered daze.

"I think you do know why you asked that" His tone wasn't taunting or teasing, just filled with as much passion as mine.

His hand stopped just below my belly button as he started tracing his index finger in line with my waistband.

Shit shit shit! His finger...no! This can't be happening!.

"I can touch u if u want me to" He rasped sinking his fingers a little deeper near my waistband. I don't know what to do or say. I am totally speechless.

Do I really want him to touch me? Isn't it wrong to want that? I just stare into his eyes because that's the only thing I can focus on right now. And no matter how long i stare, the only thought ringing in my mind is 'let him', 'yes, i want u to touch me..'.

I was about to say something along those lines when his cellphone dings. Both our heads snap in the direction of the tune. He, however, doesn't try to get his phone. In my mind, i think i need some more time to think because this is a big deal for me, so, i leap from under him and get his phone. My eyes widen in shock.

It was probably the worst decision I had ever made. It was basically a location pinpointer message, used when u are trying to find someone. And the location pinpointer had just found the exact location of my sister Gemma.

"What is it?" He asked me in concern, stopping his fingers altogether.

"You tell me..." I showed him the phone and as soon he laid his eyes on the screen, he immediately took the phone away from me and sat up on the bed staring terrifyingly at it.

"Why were you trying to find my sister?" I ask him getting up to sit properly. I am not angry or mad at him, just curious. I wasn't even sure he knew I had a sister.

"Your dad asked me to" He said politely.

Dad? Well, i guess it's not that bad if he did...i mean it has been weeks since we have talked with Gemma. I guess with how many resources Louis has, he must have thought he could find her. That's not so bad, is it?

"Okay... that's good then. Although, you could have told me. I could've helped u too....but it's great u found out now where she is...so i guess it's alright" I chuckled to lighten the mood. He looked at me with sad eyes and a smile on his face.

"What?" I was thoroughly confused now.

It wasn't a bad thing to track her down, Louis! In fact i am glad u did! Now I can go and meet her, even if she's angry at me. Atleast now i am sure she's safe.

"I have been tracking her for a while now and-" his voice got sadder with each word.

What are you trying to tell me Louis?

"What!??" I ask, in complete shock and dismay. 

"And, I should have told u where she has been this whole time... I was gatekeeping the info because I wanted to cause you pain..." He ducked down his head as if in redemption. It seemed like he would start crying in a minute. As for me, I was completely shattered.

Who does this? How much u had to hate someone to keep them in the dark regarding the whereabouts of their own sibling!!??? Especially after knowing what they went through!? And he didn't even leave my father out of the picture, this insufferable dickhead!!! Atleast, he deserved to know, his daughter is safe!

"Wow, u are the biggest cold hearted dickhead I have ever met Louis! You must be feeling on top of the world right now, aren't you!??" I yell with a choked up voice, eyes full of tears and anger burning through my body. I get up from the bed and start collecting my shirt and other things.

"Harry, I am so sorry... please, I was gonna tell you whe-" He tried to stop me and explain himself in broken sentences.

"Did you tell my dad where she is?" I asked calmly, not facing him because i knew if i did, no matter what his answer is gonna be, it would result in a jaw breaking punch to his face.

"Yes! He knows..I mean I told him over text, yesterday" He said in a shivery tone, maybe silently hoping everything will be fine now.

"But with me, it obviously had to be a NEVER...right!?" I couldn't stop the tears that rolled down my cheeks as my voice broke into nothing.

"Harry, I am sorry... please, let me explain-"

"I don't want to be near you.." I murmured as I wore my shirt, wiping my tears off.

Maybe this isn't as bad as I am making it out to be, but it sure as hell hurt knowing that the guy who literally saved me today was also the reason, I was in so much pain right now.

I walked past him, and as soon as I reached the door, I turned to tell what he had been craving to hear all along, the reason for which he planned all of this...

"Congratulations, Mr. Tomlinson. You have officially achieved your aim. I am hurting and totally devastated...that's what you were hoping for will happen, right?" I glared deathly at him with teary eyes.

If my eyes could throw daggers right now, I would have stabbed him a million times for doing this to me. I do hate him! I hate you Louis!

I stormed off, slamming his door down. I can't stay in this house next to him. I needed to get away. I took my phone out and texted Niall.

*Can I stay at your house for a while Ni?*

*Sure, come over. U okay?*

*I will explain to you when i come over*

With that sent, i wear my boots, grab my jacket and leave in the dawn for Niall's house, with one thought running through my mind...

I hate him! I hate him so much!

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