Something To Marvel At :||: Steve Rogers

3.9 'Sounds Lonely'

Cobie Smulders as Agent Miriam Hill

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I stood at the top of the hydro plant, in the middle of the dam wall. I liked the smell of the breeze out here, so fresh and natural. Trees surrounded this place, their many shades of green drifting in the wind.

"What are you thinking?" Steve asked, wandering up to stand beside me.

"That I should really get out to the country more," I smiled up at him.

He returned my smile, leaning on his elbows on the stone railing and looking out at the scenery in front of us. "You know, the whole time you were napping," I chuckled at his playful tone, knowing I was about to be teased. "I braved google and memorised this certain line the woman I care about once said to me in Greek."

My smile vanished and I fought the instinct to look up at him. So, he knew then, how I felt about him. I don't suppose it changed anything. "Mmm," I tried to deflect before shaking my head. "Well, if we survive this, perhaps you could remind me what I said? Assuming this 'woman you care about' is me."

I glanced up to find Steve nodding, a patient smile on his face. "Mmmm, maybe."

I swallowed and turned to face him. "There is one thing I will apologise for."

"Oh?" He also turned his body to face me.

"Syngnómi," I press my lips together in irritation before trying again. "I'm sorry that I can't always communicate the way you need me to, the way that would bring you the most comfort, be easiest for you to understand and give you the security you need."

"Iz..."

I held my hand up to stop him from interrupting and kept going, swallowing the lump that had begun to form in my throat. "Even at the age of nine, I saw how my father treated Tony, how he failed to communicate with his son. It always confused me why he treated me the opposite. But when my parents died, it was just me and Tony. He never settled and I followed his lead. Then when I became a model, how do you find someone genuine in a sea full of fakes? No time for a relationship, to make a connection. I guess I'm used to being alone," I admitted.

Steve watched me openly but without pity. "Sounds lonely."

Lifting my chin a fraction of an inch higher. "It is."

Steve opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by the sound of footsteps behind him. We shifted to see Sam walking toward us. He paused. "I hope I'm not interrupting something?"

"Not at all," I put on a cheery smile, standing up straight. "What's up?"

Glancing at Steve to make sure it was okay to approach, he walked over. "I just thought I'd remind you Bucky is going to be there."

Steve sighed, bowing his head. "I know."

"Look," Sam pressed his lips together, not liking what he was about to say any more than I bet Steve enjoyed listening to it. "Whoever he used to be and the person he is now, I don't think he's the kind you save. He's the kind you stop."

There was a beat of silence as Steve continued staring straight ahead, jaw clenching and unclenching as thoughts swirled through that brilliant mind of his. "I don't know if I can do that."

"He might not give you a choice," Sam pressed gently. He was a good friend and this all came from a place of concern. No one wanted to see Captain America killed at the hand of a HYDRA soldier who was formerly his best friend.

Steve didn't address the issue, simply turned to Sam. "Gear up, it's time."

...

Steve was dressed in his very first Captain America uniform. We'd stealthily broken into the Smithsonian to retrieve it from the mannequin it kept warm. Considering he didn't have access to the number of suits I'd designed for him, all locked up in SHIELD, this would have to do.