Chapter 18- "Vulnerability"

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Another chapter! Hurrah!

Answer: Hogwarts, Neverland, Eragon/Jurassic park (believe it or not aha)

Dedication: @XxLifeIsGoodxX, @Cxshtxn_, @obsessedwith5boys, @_larrys_boobear_, @xStylzx, @karrystyles12, @taryneckert, @TineLoveHarry, @50_shadesofnarry (Your jokes, I cant. XD), @BriannaThornton6, & @narry_2go (I don't actually know how I would react to be honest. XD).

Words: 2006

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It hurt. It bloody hurt so badly watching Liam cry over his limp boyfriend, it hurt knowing that it was my fault. It hurt so badly knowing that I could have saved him, that it was me that should have been dying and not him. That it was me that would have been there, in his place. It hurt knowing that it wasn't, instead it was my best mate- my caring, heart of gold, best mate that would do anything for me- lying dead. He didn't deserve to die, if anyone should have died it should have been me.

But I had to keep the promises I made him, I had to protect and watch over Liam, and I had to keep up the search for the elixir. His death would not mean nothing, and I would make sure of that. My mind reminded me that I had made another promise, one to look after Harry because love was a hard thing to find. I would look after him anyways, but now with the words lingering in my mind the promise seemed more important. The task seemed dire, direr than it had. I was a mix of emotions, and I couldn't make out just one to focus on. Louis wrapped himself around Liam, tugging him away from Zayn, and after a bit of struggle, Liam complied. He buried his head into Louis' shoulder, his hands fisting his shirt tightly, and Louis' hand running soothingly up and down his back while tears fell down both their faces. Broken sobs filled the air, and an aura of mourning surrounded the ship. We were sailing away, leaving behind dead crew members and friends that had been with us for decades.

It was all a hard pill to swallow.

I thought I had gotten over this feeling, this overwhelming feeling of loss every time someone I cared about died. I thought I had steeled myself enough for this, stopped myself from hurting so much when it happened. Then again I didn't really plan on losing Zayn, I could never prepare myself for that-for this. I scrubbed roughly at my face, sniffling pathetically. My legs felt weak, my body buzzing with grief, stomach lurching with sorrow. I felt weak, and I hated the feeling. I had never felt like this before, not even when I lost my father- but I was more angry at him then anything at that point really.

I stood up nonetheless, silently making my way down the flights of stairs that separated me and Harry, Harry and I as Zayn would have corrected. I could feel the dampness on my face, the sticky sensation as the cool breeze dried the tears. I had never truly felt this way, not that I can remember anyways. Maybe I had, once upon a time, a long time ago. So long ago that I had forgotten it. Didn't matter anyways, because I felt this way now, and there was no getting rid of the immeasurable pain that thudded in my chest. No cure that I knew of anyways.

I stumbled down the corridor, slamming against the walls on occasion due to the sway of the ship and the limpness that took over my body. I fell against the door, causing it to swing open loudly, causing a loud thud to echo through the room. Both lads' head snapped in my direction, eyes wide and filled with worry and fear. Harry's lips began to twitch into a smile before he caught my expression and his eyes filled with worry. I'm sure I looked like a right mess, red faced, red rimmed eyes, runny nose, but I didn't care. I quickly got the keys, unlocking his cell, and he stepped back from me with fear in his eyes.

The worry wasn't concealed but fear over powered it just a bit. I sniffled, before throwing myself at Harry, hugging him close. I dug my face into the crook of his neck, not caring about how stiff he stood, or the fact that he hadn't wrapped his arms around me. I needed it, but I wouldn't force him to show care to me. After almost a minute, he hadn't embraced me back, and that caused more tears to run to my eyes. I was emotional at the moment, so everything sort of set me off. I pulled back, standing up straight. I wiped my eyes, and scowled going back to my usual exterior.

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