A Little Dinged Up (gxg)

Chapter 19

If you're going to have a solid relationship, you absolutely have to have trust and communication as two of your foundation pieces. Somehow, Trish and I lost that. I'm not sure if it happened over time, or we just had people subtly poisoning us against one another to the point where we just broke, but our foundation had become cracked. Could we repair it? I don't know. Did I want to try? Or would it be better to just repair a friendship with Trish, and see if Ava was still waiting for me to start a relationship with her? I guess I'd made my choice.

Ava and I hadn't fully built our foundation, and yet we had been honest to the point of being painful when communicating, and we both trusted one another. That was a good start. Could that grow? If we took that chance, could it become the bedrock of an amazing relationship? As I lay in bed snuggling with my little queen, that is all I could think about. Ava had made me better. She pulled me back from my despair and all the while she made her emotions towards me clear had never demanded a thing. She had proven that her only concern was my wellbeing, and I had to admire that about her.

Perhaps it was also telling that I wasn't ready to fight for the relationship once both Trish and I knew the truth. Was it the months of silence and hurt that had soured me on it? Was it the perceived betrayal? I don't know if I could answer that. But it did make me question the strength of that love if I wasn't willing to try and fight for it. Yet Trisha hadn't fought for it from the beginning either, so maybe it went both ways. For about an hour, I was truly incensed. Not just at Juliette for all her machinations, but also at Trish for not having said a single thing about all the crap they had been saying to her. In some ways this was worse than if she had just fallen for someone else. At least then I could have understood that her heart someone else. But this loss of faith was harder to accept. 

Either way, it was over. She had eight more months of that stupid contract that she signed, and then maybe we could try being friends again, but I couldn't hang out with her while she was with those snakes. In the meantime, I needed to live my life. I needed to go see Ava and tell her the outcome.

But that meant doing something stupid!

Nah, not really. But it would hopefully be a nice gesture. Pulling up Madison's contact number, I sent her a quick message asking for some help. This was a simple one, I just needed seven photos, and they should be easy to get.

After that, I pulled up the group chat that I had with Liv and Miki. I needed their help, and hopefully their schedule would be free in a few days. Until then, I had my Titty and her constant companionship. The unconditional love she had for me is what I hoped to give to someone else. Love free of worry and knowing they would love me back. Could Ava be that person? Or had I already lost her?

I guess I'd have to start finding that out tomorrow. But tonight, I just needed sleep. I turned onto my non-injured side and made a little nest in my pillows for Nefertiti so she could sleep next to me. With her calming purring in my ears, I fell into the first restful sleep I'd had in weeks.

I woke up feeling great. I had a purpose, to prove to Ava that I had been worth waiting for. I checked my email and found the seven images that Madison sent me, and then forwarded them to Liv with a description of what I wanted. I knew she'd give me a quick turnaround, and while I felt guilty abusing her friendship with me for expedited help, I really wanted this done fast so I could go see Ava.

While all that was churning and out of my control, I got back to something that was. I had told Miki in the interview that people would see just how I got my ribs bruised up, so I set to editing that flying suit video. It made me think that I should reach back out to Madison to see if she could recommend an editor for me. It had been four months since Nat left with everyone else, and editing my own stuff was tiring! I didn't miss Sonny as much, as making my own films wasn't too hard, and I'd already been butting heads with him.