Adrenaline

37 | jun

"Do you need help with that?"

I turn around to see Jun staring up at me trying to tie up a string of fairy lights above the back patio.

"Um—" The stool wobbles for dramatic effect. Ballerina, I am not. "Yeah, could use some help."

After taking the string of lights from me, Jun waits until I've safely grounded myself before climbing up the steps. He's not the tallest guy out there, but he's taller than I am, so he can easily hook the last section up.

Before I know it, he walks over to the end of the power strip and plugs it in. Like pulling the curtain back at midnight, all of the bulbs turn on like they're planting themselves as stars in the sky against a backdrop of Los Angeles at twilight.

"Are these for Bash's house?" Jun asks, picking up the extra boxes on the table.

"He has a pergola in his backyard. I was going to risk my life by using this stool on its deathbed to weave these between the beams."

"Could've asked for help."

"You've been...busy. I didn't want to bother you."

He sighs before dropping down onto one of the patio chairs. The one bright side of never using them is that the cushions are always so fluffy. Jun sinks into the chair, staring out at the backyard. "You're never a bother. Quite the opposite."

It's not the truth but it's kind of him to say.

"And I'm not just being nice so shut up."

Dropping down into the sliver of space next to him, I can't help but laugh. "We know each other too well."

"Can't imagine a world where we don't."

Jun's arm falls easily around my shoulders, and, as if there's been no time since we last talked to each other like this, I rest my head against his chest with my feet tucked under me.

It's been a few days since the TV special was filmed. And while I would classify it as a success, my brain can't help but rethink every answer given and how it'll be perceived when it's eventually released. Not having Jun there to work through it all together—the good, the bad, the elastic in-betweens—was difficult. Especially since it wasn't that he wasn't there; he was just out of reach.

"I'm sorry. You were right; I was overstepping and shouldn't have inserted myself into the middle of an argument. It wasn't my place."

He plays with the charms dangling off my friendship bracelet. No matter how many years it's been or everything it's been through—Jun's has unfortunately suffered too many scrapes from the years of skateboarding and falling from said skateboard—mine manages to hang on.

"Thank you. I understand why you did it, and I appreciate you trying to help. I know you're coming from a good place."

"Still. It doesn't absolve me of my responsibility to know when and where to voice my opinion when it's solicited."

Jun flashes me a look of appreciation.

"I heard you two have been talking. Somewhat."

Jun laughs; a mixture of humor and pain. "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"And how do—do you feel?"

He looks down at me with a smile. "Are you trying to play therapist right now?"

"I'm trying to be a friend. Also, that's Everleigh's job. And no one can replace her."