BBH Oneshots 💖 ~ Hiatus

•~Incorrect Quotes Pt.2~•

Another part cuz I can. I am writing y'all's requests so ya. This just gonna be content til I finish the requests :)
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Wilbur: But what about Quackity? He was my SOULMATE!
Bad: You said that about a shape shifting salmon once!
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Dream: Do you love Bad?
Techno: Yeah, I do.
Dream: George! I told you I knew it! You owe me 100 bucks!
George: We all love Bad. You should've asked if they were IN love with them.
Techno: I thought that was implied.
George: ...
Dream: ...
Techno, looking straight at George: Congrats Dream, you just won 100 bucks.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: Time sensitive question how flirt boy.
Dream: Throw rocks at he.
Quackity: Hot Dogs.
Techno: Kill him.
Bad: Thanks guys.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Karl: *about Bad and Dream* They make a cute couple, huh?
Sapnap: They certainly are standing next to each other.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Skeppy: This date is boring!
Bad: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store.
Skeppy: Then why did you invite me?
Bad: I didn't, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Bad I'll do whatever I want!"
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Quackity: Are you an F5 key? Because that ass is refreshing.
Bad: Are you a software update? because not right now.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Skeppy: I put the pun in punishment.
Dream: I put the top in unstoppable.
Bad: I put the "cute" in execute.
Eret: I put the sexy in dyslexia.
Sapnap: I put the ass in class.
Quackity, joking: I put the D in Bad.
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Quackity: *angrily presses Bad against a wall* WHERE'S THE MONEY?!
Bad: ...
Bad: Are we about to kiss-
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: How do you know how to kiss? Like who teaches you?
Dream: Well it's actually a class, but unfortunately it's full right now.
Dream: Would you like me to tutor you?
George: That was smooth.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Quackity: Hey, I'm getting in the shower. Wanna help me out?
Bad: ...Have you never taken a shower before?
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Quackity: Talk dirty to me~
Bad: Inflation is a serious problem and lumber prices are at a high.
Quackity: Wha-
Bad: The economy is in shambles.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: Who do we know that has handcuffs?
Wilbur: Well Quackity and I-
Quackity: *elbows Wilbur*
Wilbur: ...wouldn't know.
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Bad: Smart is attractive. Educate me on something I don't know!
Quackity: The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus.
Bad: Stop.
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Quackity: I'm proud to identify as morosexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.
Bad: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?
Quackity, already taking off their clothes: God, Bad, you're so fucking stupid.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad, walking into his house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Dream: Hey.
Sam: Hi.
George: Hello.
Antfrost: Hey!
Bad: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Sapnap: We were out of Doritos.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: I CAN'T DO IT!
Dream, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!
Bad: I CANT FREAKING DO IT ANYMORE
Quackity: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.
Bad:
Bad: I appreciate it,
Bad: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-
Sapnap: Bad-
Bad: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!
Antfrost: Bad we gotta-
Bad: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FREAKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.
Bad: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'
Bad, motioning to Skeppy: NOT FREAKING THIS
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: Time for plan G.
Dream: Don't you mean plan B?
Bad: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.
George: What about plan D?
Bad: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.
Sapnap: What about plan E?
Bad: I'm hoping not to use it. Quackity dies in plan E.
Skeppy: I like plan E.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Cop: You're receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Dream: Shit.
Sapnap: Wait, three?
Cop: Yeah?
Bad: OH MY GOD GEORGE FELL OFF!!!
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: Are you ready to commit?
Wilbur: Like, a crime or a relationship?
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Skeppy, sweating: Bad, there's something I need to ask you-
Bad: Finally! You're proposing!
Skeppy: How'd you know?
Bad: Sgeppy, you've dropped the ring five times during dinner.
Bad: I even picked it up once.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Dream: Ooh, somebody has a crush
George: Pfft, I don't have a crush on Bad I just think they're cool, it's not like I stay up at night thinking about them.
*Later that night*
George, very much awake: Uh oh.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Quackity: sapnu puaS.
Sapnap: What??
Bad: What language is that.
Quackity: Turn your phone 180 degrees.
*Quackity was removed from the groupchat*
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: What are you in the mood for?
Quackity: World domination.
Bad: That's a bit ambitious.
Quackity: You are my world.
Bad: Aww...
Quackity:
Bad:
Quackity:
Bad: OH.
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Dream: Due to personal reasons, I will be fucking sinking to the bottom of the ocean in a large metal box.
George: Did Bad say 'I love you' and you said 'Thanks'?
Dream: THE REASONS ARE PERSONAL–
•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•
Bad: Okay, I'm going to get the wedding cake.
Skeppy: Perfect, while you do that I'll check on the ring bear.
Bad: ...
Bad: You mean ring bearER, right?
Skeppy: ...
Bad: Look me in the eyes and tell me you aren't going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.
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•~Misc~•
969 Words Total

•~Date~•
dd/mm/yyyy
Started: 19/08/2022
Finished: 19/08/2022

•~Tag Rankings~•
#480 - ships
#488 - dsmp
#129 - platonic
#108 - bbh
#335 - badboyhalo
#204 - sbi
#50 - sleepybois
#174 - beeduo
#05 - dadboyhalo
#02 - karlhalo
#15 - soothalo
#51 - quackhalo
#47 - dreamhalo
#48 - techhalo
#15 - georgehalo