ɴᴇᴍᴇꜱɪꜱ ║ ᴛᴏᴍᴍʏɪɴɴɪᴛ

Chapter 53 : "Keep your chin up high"

The feeling was nagging at his throat, stomping on his stomach, and crawling up his spine. It had turned physical as droplets of sweat emerged on the palm of his hands and nape of his neck, the chilly air clashing with the liquid and forcing him to slightly shiver.

And it was all just silence. Pure, unbothered, and painful silence.

Probably for the first time in his life, Tommy truly begged for a sinkhole to appear right below him and bury him under where no one would see him again.

The shame and discomfort he felt completely prevented him from looking anywhere but into his lap, his hands so jittery that he had to clasp them together to at least try to keep them still. It didn't hide the subtle movements of his heel bouncing, his body desperately trying to look for an output to his fight-or-flight reaction.

Where could he even start to explain himself?

As if it wasn't already obvious enough.

"So..." He cleared his throat, his eyes shifting slightly upwards to take a glance at her, but just as quick as they had moved they returned right to the sight of his trusty jeans.

Unlike him, Ray didn't seem nervous in the slightest. In fact, her body was fully relaxed, something he hadn't seen her do ever. Her eyes remained set on the forest in front of them, an unnaturally soft and almost happy expression on her face.

"Would you want to tell me what... happened?" Tommy choked out nervously, almost physically smacking himself after hearing himself.

At first, Ray remained quiet, and although her eyes continued looking at the front, he could see the thoughts clouding up his eyes.

In a panic, he quickly attempted to revert his words. "Not that you have to tell me anything, I mean if you don't feel comfortable with it-"

"I told them the truth."

Tommy paused. Ray's voice had never been so soft and gentle before. Sure, she wasn't the loud type, but this seemed to even stretch her own limits. It's as if overnight she'd become a different person, a much more content and fulfilled person.

Her eyes intersecting with his was what brought him out of his trance, and Tommy did his absolute best to maintain his dignity and not look away. But the look he gave her was not threatening or defensive at all, and she even smiled at him a little bit.

"The truth? What do you mean?" He asked confused.

"The truth! About the streams, my life, and- everything I guess." Ray exclaimed, "absolutely everything." 

Tommy knew better than to bring up sensitive topics, but her reaction was practically begging him to ask her:

"And...? What happened?" He asked as cautiously as he possibly could despite his stress clearly infiltrating his voice.

Ray took her time to answer, looking out into the distance once again before her smile widened.

"And... nothing."

What?

"Nothing happened." She repeated, almost as if to herself and not to him.

In fact, she'd been in denial about that part of the story as well. Her tantrum rendered her with no reprocussions, not even a further discussion. It was as if she'd finally let herself fall into the ocean, but instead of drowning to the bottom, she floated back up again. Such was the feeling of freedom and relief that submerged her body at that moment.

Knowing he was still looking at her, shock written all over his face, Ray decided to elaborate.

"I haven't really spoken to them- I mean, my parents- for the past week. I don't think I've even seen them. They're probably just too busy to deal with me right now." She explained, letting her back hit the back of the bench. "I told them what I want to do with my life and that I wouldn't be held back by their disapproval." 

Tommy, being the voice of reason, immediately fell into worry. "But that doesn't mean they've accepted it, does it? What if they scold you for this? They haven't taken away all your electronics, have they?"

"No. In fact, they gave them back." Ray turned to look at him, and Tommy watched as she took her own phone out of her pocket. "My PC and everything too. Oh, right, and this-" She turned her body to reach out for her backpack, unzipping the small compartment at the front and taking a phone out of it.

"No, but, what if-"

Ray then reached the phone out, an expectant look on her face. With slight hesitation, Tommy moved to take it from her open palm. However, as soon as his hand landed on the phone, her hand tensed from under it, slightly grasping at the palm with her fingers. Tommy swore he almost got a heart attack when her other hand landed on top of his gently.

In shock, he looked up to see Ray looking at him with a serious gaze.

"There are no ifs anymore, Tommy. All of this... it made me realize that I in fact have a voice. That I can say, and do, and live as I desire. I'm not scared of what my parents want, in fact, I don't care at all." She then smiled slightly. "I kept my chin up high, and now, I think I'm the happiest person in the world."

Tommy was completely stunned, not a single word able to escape his partially opened lips. The wind blew harder, making Ray's hair begin waving accordingly, but none of that mattered as they stared at each other.

"And I... thank you. Thank you for everything." Ray choked out, her overwhelming happiness causing tears to begin filling her eyes.

And Tommy watched in shock as she scooted closer, her arms wrapping around his neck with his phone still in her hands. Her body pressed against his, just as it had moments ago, and she pressed her head in the nape of his neck.

The proximity of this physical contact had Tommy burning up, his face and body turning a tomato-red color. However, in that moment, none of that mattered because a smile appeared on his face, the happiness that she'd inflicted upon him quickly overtaking any other thoughts on his mind.

She was finally happy. So he was too.

It simultaneously felt like forever and nothing before Ray finally pulled away, beyond the reach of Tommy's arms which had instinctively wrapped around her during their hug. He saw her subtly wipe a tear from her eye, but upon putting the phone in his lap, she suddenly stood up.

"I have to get going. I've missed like half of first period already." She laughed slightly, turning and hastily walking off toward the front of the school.

"What- hey, wait up!" Tommy yelled after her, quickly grabbing the phone and shoving it in his pocket before jogging up behind her.

As he caught up to her, Ray suddenly turned to look at him, a mischievious grin on her lips.

"Is your heart always beating so fast, Tom?" She suddenly asked, and Tommy couldn't help but pause, his face becoming even redder.

"W-what?! No! I mean- yes! Yes, with my low blood pressure and everything! Hey, don't laugh at me!" He yelled, running after Ray who was happily laughing.

we're just going to ignore me not updating for like 4 months