Autumn Showers

9- The one where we get ready

Butterflies aggressively dance around my stomach as I shakily pick up my contour brush, with my non-broken hand and begin to carve my cheekbones. I talked to Claudia about the prospect of going to a party, and she was thrilled for me, she insisted it was a key part of my recovery. To be able to at-least try and experience parts of my old life that I once loved. But she also wanted to let me know, that if I felt to overwhelmed, it was completely okay to leave early, 'just fake a headache and get out of there.', where her exact words. She also wanted me to know, that if I were triggered in any shape or form, that she was only a phone call away.

Sometimes I felt wretched about my hostile attitude towards her, because I realise that in terms of therapists, she was probably one of the best I could have. She genuinely cared about her patient's well-being. The issue wasn't with her at all, in-fact I didn't really mind her. My issue was going to therapy in general, I wasn't ready to go but no one cared about my wishes, I was still being forced to face the issues that haunted me every-day.

My bedroom door bursts open, I clutch my desk as my body flinches. My eyes widen with alarm as I whip my head around that fast, I'm afraid It'll cause me whiplash. Scarlett is stood in my doorway with two larges bags and a wide grin.

'Your mom let me in! She said just to come straight up, remember we said we'd get ready together?'

Shit, we actually did.

I was hoping that she would have forgot about that.

My eyes scan her figure as I look at her properly, I frown slightly, her once wild pink curls are now a honey blonde and softer.

'You changed your hair.'

She flashes me a sheepish smile, 'Yeah, Rick told me that I should go back to my natural colour, so I would seem more mature, now I'm dating a college guy.'

My frown deepens, 'Scar, you shouldn't have to change yourself for anyone, let alone a guy.'

Her cheeks flush slightly, 'N-No, it isn't like that. I-I wanted the change, I've missed my natural colour.'

'I like them both.' I say softly, 'But, I feel like pink matched your personality, like it was so bright and happy.'

Scarlett's face softens, 'T-Thank you, that's a really nice thing to say.'

I shrug, 'I meant it.'

She claps her hands together, 'Now, what are you going to wear?'

I bit my lip, 'I don't actually know, what sort of vibe is it?'

'Usually, it's just casual. I go for a classic, jeans and a nice-top combo.'

I nod, okay I can do this. Part of me was relieve that I wouldn't have to wear a dress, I find wearing dresses uncomfortable now, they promoted to much access for people who have wandering hands.

We chat casually about random topics, as we finish applying the rest of our make-up, I pull my hair into a high-pony tail, I take out the curler which has been holding the full-fringe, I usually tuck behind my ears, I style it messily, until I'm satisfied.

'You must be one of the only people, who I know that are hot enough to pull off a fringe.'

I laugh at her compliment, 'Thanks.'

I turn on my heel and walk towards my wardrobe, I pull out my light blue flared jeans, flare jeans have a special chokehold on my heart, but I often refrained from wearing them because my ex- friends would give me judgey comments on them. I scan my hangers for a top, I purse my lips together before pulling out a long-sleeved burnt-orange crop-top. I go into the bathroom, so I can change discreetly, it takes me a few minutes to be able to squeeze my cast into the sleeves.