Love or War

Sister-Ryujin

I wake up with my body feeling extremely sore. I have control of my body again though. I remember Yeji and everything she said. A part of me believes that she's sorry but another part of me thinks that maybe she's saying that to get us away from the vampires.

"What the hell happened out there, Ryujin?" San is sitting in front of me. I'm tired of seeing his face every time I wake up from being unconscious.

"How should I know? I had no control the whole time Irving was talking and fighting with Yeji."

"You're expecting me to believe that you didn't successfully get control back? I can easily control your human mind, Ryujin. Do not mess with me" he grits his teeth.

"If I knew how to get control of my wolf again then I would have ran away from everyone. I wouldn't have stayed there to be taken by you again. I have no clue what happened. Why don't you ask my wolf that you're controlling to tell you what happened?"

"This is not good" he stands up, "I can't lose control of your wolf during the eclipse. I also don't know what your wolf said when I lost control. I couldn't hear anything or see anything through him."

"If it's not you then that means I don't have full control of your wolf. A part of his subconscious is fighting the rest or it's something else" he starts pacing around the room while biting his nails.

"You can just stop this" I tell him.

He goes in front of me and grabs my face, "I'm getting sick and tired of hearing you say this. You can say that all you want and nothing will change."

He digs his sharp nails into my cheeks and I wince from the pain.

"You better start supporting this soon. This is your last chance or you will lose whatever control you have left" he pushes me to the ground as he releases my face.

"I'm going out. I need to figure out what happened today" he walks over me while I grab my face.

I lay on the ground, again feeling hopeless.

'Irving, my Irving, if you're really in there then please keep fighting. I sensed how you wanted to protect me from Yeji. Please, come back to me.'

I wait for a response but nothing.

I sigh as I sit up. I keep rubbing my cheeks to kind of help ease the pain. I suddenly remember the pack that my wolf killed. The innocent pups and the look in their eyes before Irving killed them.

We really have become a monster and I don't see it stopping at all.

I try to remember everything that happened with Yeji. My Irving was able to get control back but how? What was happening that made him able to get control back even for a brief moment? What was he feeling at that moment?

I then remember that Yeji was also becoming unconscious before I passed out. I hope she's okay. I close my eyes to take a deep breath because I hate that even though my human thoughts and body aren't controlled by the vampires, the moment that I do something that will go against them then my wolf will stop me.

The door opens again and San has a smile on his face.

"Guess who's going on their second attack?" He sounds so cheerful.

"Please, no" I beg as I get on my knees right away.

"I need to figure out whether losing control of your wolf was just an anomaly or you figured out how to take control back and you're lying to me. I'll have back ups in case you try to run away so don't even think about it" he threatens.