Start Again

Part 25

It was weird coming home. Lindsey returned to his family home a cheater. Kristen had been accusing him of having an affair with Stevie for years and now he couldn't deny it anymore without it being a lie. Good thing he had a few days by himself to figure out what happened at Stevie's. 

That first night at home, Lindsey stayed in his studio, which was nothing out of the ordinary. He had his acoustic guitar in his lap, gently strumming the strings, mindlessly variating between Never Going Back Again and other melodies he didn't even recognized himself. Why was Stevie so calm about them sleeping together? He fully expected them to have an argument in the morning about how wrong, what they did, was. Nothing. Well, not nothing. They had sex again instead. And what was that about, her saying that she had some kind of feelings towards him? Wasn't Eliot the man of her dreams, perfect in every way? Judging by the marks she'd left on his body, Lindsey assumed, no. 

What about his own marriage? Lindsey wasn't happy, that much was clear. Even though divorce had crossed his mind several times, he wasn't seriously considering it as the only option, was he? Were things that bad? Of course, it didn't help that Kristen initiated the majority of their fights. Maybe she was no longer happy to be married to him either. 

Then Lindsey thought about his kids. His three children he had with Kristen. Yes, he and Stevie managed raising Luke while not being together, but their son had never known it to be anything different. As terrible as it sounded, he was used to it. How would he explain to his other children if he and Kristen chose to separate? They were still so little. This was not daddy going on tour, no, this was permanent. 

What did their night together mean anyway? Did it mean anything at all? Lindsey knew, from personal experience, that Stevie stayed in relationships even after being unfaithful. But that was such a long time ago. Surely, she had changed over the years. She'd been pushing him away for nearly a decade, despite the fact that they were still clearly in love with each other. What about Eliot? How was she going to handle that? Was she going to tell him the truth or keep it to herself, pretend nothing happened? Hope that he would never find out?

All these questions were giving Lindsey a headache. He needed to focus on something else, otherwise he was finally going to go insane.