MY lover from Daegu

Chapter 23

Two days after YJ's death, I decided to attend his funeral and bring the kids with me. My ex-mother-in-law requested that Senna wear a hanbok and Kobe a black suit and pants a very common outfit that the mourners wore. Yoongi decided to go with me but stayed with his friends when we got to Yoolsei Hospital, where YJ's funeral was held. I bowed and greeted YJ's mom and brother. Senna and Kobe stood frozen in front of YJ's picture. Kobe started crying, and Senna was emotionless, just staring at YJ's picture. I stood up and took Kobe with me when I heard someone crying in one corner; it was Aera. I went to her and touched her shoulder, but Senna ran to me and yelled, "Mommy, no!" I could see the anger in my daughter's eyes as she glared at Aera. She's only 4, but she understood that this is the woman who caused us pain. I pulled Senna and Kobe to go outside; Senna was kicking and screaming. I could see my daughter struggling with her emotions; she was too young to experience a loss. I texted Yoongi that I would be going home with the kids. He texted me back and said that he would stay for a bit and then go home as well. 

When we reached home, Senna started screaming and yelling, "Appa, where is my Appa?" I started getting frustrated and yelled at them as well. Yoongi returned and found the three of us crying on the floor. Senna and Kobe are still sobbing and yelling for their appa. I couldn't help but yell back at my kids.

"Why are you looking for Appa when I'm the one who's alive and in here?" Your appa is dead and not coming back; deal with it".

Yoongi went to sit on the floor with the kids to pacify them while I was still yelling my heart out.

Yoongi said, "Nessa just stop, please. The kids are hurting can't you see?

Yoongi went to hug and pacify me of my frustration and went back to sit with the kids. Kobe in his muffled voice asked "Ahjussi can you be our appa"

I yelled at Kobe. " Go to your room Kobe, you're on timeout. You can't just ask Ahjussi to be your appa".

"Nessa, please stop, let me talk to the kids".

"Yoongi, don't just say yes to the kids just because they ask you to".

"You don't have to tell me, Nessa, but I want to do it. I want to be their dad more than anything else. I know I can't replace YJ, but if this will help them ease their pain, I will do it. I love them more than my life. The first time I laid my eyes on them, I already claimed them as mine, just like when I saw you again that night. You belong to someone else, but in my heart, I already claimed you as mine and mine alone"

I started bawling at what Yoongi said. I could feel the pure love he has for me and my kids. I leaned in and kissed him, and tears started to fall from his beautiful face.

"Nessa, I've always dreamed of being with you. For four years I've waited, and now you're here. Your kids, our kids made being with you a lot more special. So please, allow me to be their father; allow me to be a father to them. With tears in my eyes, I nodded. Senna and Kobe saw that Yoongi was crying too; they hugged him and wiped the tears from his face.

Senna muttered, "Ahjussi, don't cry; it's ok". 

Kobe said, "I'll play the piano for you, Ahjussi if you want so you won't be sad". Yoongi let out a smile at the innocent remarks from my kids.

Then Yoongi said, "From now on, you call me Papa."

"Papa ahjussi is that the same as Appa?" Yoongi and I both laughed at Kobe.

"No more Ahjussi just Papa".

And just like that, we're officially a family.

***************

Our lives continue with Yoongi, who is frequently on tour. He flew to Singapore last week for a two-night performance with his group. My kids and I watch him on the local Korean channel for updates on his tour, interviews, and guesting. Senna was thrilled to find out that her papa works with her favorite "triplets." On the last day of the group's tour, they guested on a local Singaporean channel. The interviewer had a surprise guest for them, particularly Suga. The girl was Hana, Suga's ex-girlfriend. They were all surprised to see the guest. Hana went straight to Suga and kissed him on the lips, which caught him by surprise. Suga was uncomfortable. Hana answered all the interviewers' questions and told them that they are a couple again.