My Moon

13.06.13

Author POV
Finally, it's our debut today. We have been practicing and working hard for so long. Most people don't get to see this day but we did.

Jimin POV
I have to make sure I get everything right on the stage. I only practiced it for two months but my members is doing this for 6 months. I can't mess this up.

Finally, our stage was over. I was kind of satisfied with our performance. I enjoyed the time. In some days we become the hot debut group but it only lasted for very short time. However, I came across some critics and mostly was about me being chubby. ARMY gave me a nickname as "mangettok" and I loved it but I can't show this image to people because this will affect my group in ratings. People judge idols in all the ways and my weight and chubbiness will be wrong.

I decided to be more strict on myself and to start a diet. As it was our debut we did went to various radio stations to promote ourselves and the cause we stand for. However, people didn't welcome us with full heart and I could see them treating my members as some low celeb people. I promise we will be big one day and then they would beg us to come to their show.

In all these programs and shows. I found a lot of questions about members. And no matter what question was I answered "Jungkook". I don't know why, but if a question is Favorite member, or a member to spend a day with, a member to share a room, a member who is closest to you, or a member you feel special for. As for me my answer was always " Jungkook" above that I was not able to hide the fact that I really admire Jungkook. Before debut when he went to the US for dance for a month I realized I didn't see him as a member or a brother. Because I missed him like a crazy person. I even cried during nights and practice just because I missed him a lot. Once I requested PDnim to let me talk to Jungkook because I had something to ask. When I heard his voice after 20 days I had tears in my eyes and I just asked where is soy sauce. He yelled saying "Ya! Hyungnim why are you asking me this?" After that I asked him about his experience and if he is eating enough. For me it was getting hard to breathe without him. So I stayed in our dance room and slept there. I was missing him. When he came back I couldn't stop smiling! I was so happy. As we were at a convient store and he told me that he don't wanna debut and be a dancer it felt like my world stop. But I just laughed and said "Don't be stupid jungkook-ah! If you are not in Bts then we are incomplete. And you can be still be a dancer by being in the group. You got nothing to lose!"

I figured it that I see him as a potential lover but not a brother and this thought scared me death. I accepted that my love will always be unrequited. The love deep like an ocean which doesn't have a shore to held.

The only question in my mind. What do I do now?

To be cotd.