teenage fools

its over?

The words came out of her mouth and it all went down, like I was experiencing a nightmare awake and damnit I'm still hoping this is all one terrible dream because I don't know if I can handle your hands on another and your lips touching not mine I don't think I can handle this heart break and I don't want to

I'm so fucking sad and all the butterflies I had are drowned and my stomach is empty not only from lack of them but lack of food and water for I can't eat anything without wishing you were here to shove it in my mouth or steal my food

I want the late night phone calls and fuck, I want you but you don't want me and I'm trying to be okays with that but I don't know how to be okays with it and this Is all too much for me I was getting better and I started to not hate myself but now I'm not so sure why should I not hate myself? It seems as though the universe hates me enough for the both of us but I might as well join in