Chapter 42*

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It was a couple of weeks later that Riley went straight from school to the university to turn in his application for a college visit

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It was a couple of weeks later that Riley went straight from school to the university to turn in his application for a college visit. He would have given it to Eran to do it for him, but Eran had just completed some extensive research and was taking a break at home.

Riley had been to the campus more times than he could bother to count, but certain areas he'd yet stepped foot in. Finally, he found the proper office. I told Eran I'd be home quickly, but I already wasted too much time. It was now Riley's goal to drop off the application and return home to his lover as soon as possible.

"Oh!"

Riley turned to look in the direction of the exclamation and saw an unfamiliar man who looked to be in his mid to late 30s.

"Aren't you Eran's..."

Who was this guy and how did he know Riley?

The man smiled charmingly. "I'm one of Eran's professors." He held out his hand and Riley hesitantly shook it. "Are you here to see Eran?"

"No. Eran's..." Riley trailed off. "At home," he finished, deciding to be honest; it wasn't like answering that way made it obvious that they were living together.

"You two are really close, eh? Even though he rarely talks about you, I can tell he's changed since his first year of undergraduate."

How the hell does he know about me? Wait—He's known Eran that long? It was only one year less than Elias's time with Eran. "Sorry, what was your name?"

"Ah, Tate. Let me give you my business card." His smile reached his eyes but there was something hidden that made Riley wary. Still, he took the business card.

"Right, Eran's mentioned you before." Eran really had maybe once or twice along with some other 'colleagues.' Riley watched the man's response. If his eyes lit up, Riley decided, Tate was potentially interested in Eran, and he'd have to be careful.

"Really? Well, I was his TA back when he was in undergrad. Since then, we've been pretty close."

Riley gazed at him with a deadpan expression. This asshole—no, no. I shouldn't assume he's boasting. Though close is a gross overstatement since I know for a fact, Eran doesn't get close to anyone.

Tate glanced at the papers in Riley's hand. "Are you planning to apply here?"

"Yeah."

"That's great. Eran is probably happy, eh?" Riley started to scold himself for suspecting Tate of any ill-intent or loaded statements but stopped as Tate continued. "You know, I have to thank you. Since Eran lost Jamee, I think you've filled that hole."

Riley looked at him blankly, then dared to ask, "Who's Jamee?"

"Hm? Eran's little brother. You're a lot like him, but Eran's probably already told... you... that..."

A horrible feeling crept through Riley's chest. He tried not to show how unsettled he felt as he wondered whether the professor was lying.

Tate's smile faded. "Oh..." He frowned. "Oh. Don't tell me," his volume dropped, "Eran never told you? I'm so sorry. I thought Eran would've already told you before since you're so close—" He put his hand on Riley's shoulder. "Look, if I'd known you didn't know, I wouldn't have said anything. I'll let Eran know and apologize."

Riley fumbled over his words as his mind reeled. "Uh... no... It's okay. It's probably best if you don't." Is this real?

"Eran... was really devastated when his brother died and everyone could still see it even when he came here. The fact that he didn't tell you..." Tate cast his sad eyes down. "Th-that explains so much." He turned away as he twisted his mouth in shame. "You're so similar, I really thought... God, I'm such an idiot."

Riley worried, if Tate was serious, then he was truly upset and Riley thought it was his duty to calm Tate's worries. "No. It's alright... You didn't do anything wrong. Don't blame yourself. I-I'll—it's for me to deal with. Th-thanks..." Riley turned away and opened the office door. He handed the application to the student employee at the desk, and after giving him a double take, she wished him luck and set the papers in a tray of other applications.

When Riley stepped back into the hallway, Tate was gone. Still in a catatonic state, he started walking towards the science buildings. Halfway to the lab, he picked up speed then soon found himself running.

He stopped his momentum by grasping the door frame of the lab, quite apparently startling Elias who sat at his desk.

"Hey...?"

"Who is Tate?"

"A professor?"

"Are he and Eran close?"

Elias shifted his eyes in thought, then lifted his palm to rock it side-to-side.

"You know about Jamee, right?"

Elias's confusion was replaced by genuine, visible shock.

"He died." 

The man remained silent and his expression became solemn. Riley's fingers clutched the door frame tighter. "Yeah. He died at 14. Eran was 17."

"And is it true that I resemble him?" Eran was short with light skin, eyes, and hair. Riley was tall with brown skin, eyes, and hair. How could his brother look anything like me?

"N—" Elias cut himself off. "Not really."

"You're lying," Riley accused, heart still racing.

"He was a reckless, mischievous delinquent... You're reminiscent but different and Eran's not with you because of him... You should talk to Eran yourself."

Riley wasn't surprised that Elias had quickly figured out Riley's train of thoughts. "What do you think?" he asked, eyes pleading, "Honestly..."

After a short hesitation, Elias answered with deliberateness. "I think Eran loves you and it's—you're different, even if your similarities are what interested him at first."

So that's why...

"But you should really talk with Eran," the elder man continued. "Did Tate tell you this?"

"Thanks, Elias." Riley abruptly escaped the man who had just confirmed his fears.

More so than when that girl and Eran kissed, Riley's head was spinning. And the sickness he had felt at that time was currently replaced by a dull, aching pain within his chest.

 And the sickness he had felt at that time was currently replaced by a dull, aching pain within his chest

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A/N: Tate didn't do it on purpose, he swears!

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