Holding On

Thirty-Seven

"Hmm, so what's going on with you and Zain? Why doesn't he come to pick you up for lunch anymore these days?" Eva asked as they finished up in the rehearsal room, as if her control had finally snapped.

For two days now, Eva had been giving her a look of concealed curiosity whenever it was lunch time and Em went with her for lunch, but it was obvious she was holding back her questions because she feared what happened the last time would repeat. But even frogs croak when water overwhelms them.

Sighing, Emma waited for her employees to walk out before turning to Eva. "We're no more friends, Eva." She hadn't wanted to tell Eva because she didn't want to face the proud look Eva would throw her like i-just-knew-it.

"Whoa? Why?" Eva asked, seemingly perplexed. "What happened?"

"You were right all along. Zain never really tried to forget me. He was only faking."

Eva looked surprised, but not shocked. "Oh, so he finally dropped his façade? When was that?" Em groaned when she saw the look she'd feared on Eva's face.

"It was the day he brought me to talk to my father. I lied when I said I only went for a walk, Eva. I had gone back to Zain's apartment, and that was when he told me he still loves me and wants me back." She thought of the look of horror Eva would give her if she'd revealed how she'd kissed Zain, and she held back the bit of information.

"What did you tell him?"

Em casted Eva an incredulous glance. "What do you think? That 'oh, I'm so sorry Zain but I can only offer friendship'? Seriously, I just told you we're no longer friends. You should figure out I ended things."

Then as Zain's last words to her flew through her mind, she shuddered from dread. "But he said he won't give up. That he's continue to insist till I leave George to be with him."

"That son of a potato." Eva said, grinding her teeth. Think of Eva to pass funny comments even when she was angry. "But don't worry. I think he'll give up soon. Just go on avoiding him."

I'm not so sure.

"But why do you have to look like you regret that decision to kick him out of your life? For Pete's sake that's the best you could've done." Then Eva suddenly covered her mouth to stifle a gasp. "What if he tells George about the history the two of you share? Oh, Emma. Why haven't you even told George yet?"

"Zain won't do that." Emma assured her friend even while she felt fear sear through her heart. What would George think of her lying to him? "And I don't regret ending my friendship with Zain because I know it's for the best. I just thought our friendship could've gone on great especially since Amy likes him so much. He just had to destroy it."

Without a tinge of sympathy, Eva parted her on the shoulder. "I'm sorry for that." She said even though Emma knew she all but wanted to say "I told you so."

**~**~**

George left on another business trip to California that Friday evening. After he apologized profusely for how much this partnered project was making him travel, Em assured him she would be fine, but after he'd left, leaving an ominous sense of another lonely night, she begun to resent him, his absence at night forcing in a reality she didn't want to face; the reality of her feelings for another man who wasn't her husband.

To distract herself, Emma went to spend the night in her daughters room. They played paper games of which Amy was much still an amateur, eliciting laughter from both of them. Even if she wasn't that content, her daughter's laughter and happiness was enough to boost her spirits.

Amy suddenly fell asleep when she couldn't seem to fight off the drowsiness any longer. Disappointed but berating herself for keeping her daughter up this late like never before, Emma covered her with the quilt. And as she made to sleep herself, all the things she hadn't wanted to feel came rushing back to her.