Ocean Breathes Salty

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an // sorry about the break. got acrylics which made typing a nightmare and then my computer blue screened lol but I'm back ;-;

 got acrylics which made typing a nightmare and then my computer blue screened lol but I'm back ;-;

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No one comes to wake you up in the morning. You check your phone and see a few messages from apps, texts not involving you in the family group chat, and nothing from Bruce. You put your phone back down. Everything rushes back. Your stomach slicks with grief and you quickly wipe your eyes. You want to mourn, but... Alfred enters without knocking, placing a huge bouquet of light blue hydrangeas, white roses, and belladonna delphinium. He props them up, looking them over carefully, fixing the white bow around the clear glass vase.

He glances over at you quickly before starting. "Oh, my apologies, dear (Y/N). I thought you were still sleeping and didn't want to wake you." He says, averting his eyes. You pull the blankets up higher, even though you're dressed in your regular pajamas. "You're fine... I just woke up." You reply, your voice scratchy.

"I'll have Jacques make you some tea..." He heads to the door before pausing and looking back. "I am sorry for your loss, little dove." The nickname is sweet but causes tears to rush back as he leaves.

You don't know what to do in this situation. Kara is dead, yes, but... How would you tell her mom? If her mom knows? How would you approach the "journalists" who would approach you once the news breaks? You also want to know how they will spin her death. The Court of Owls won't let the general public know they're lurking everywhere and Kara is--no was--renowned. You force yourself to get up, looking at the flowers. Bruce moved your "library" in here and you for a moment think about going searching for the flowers, but instead take a picture of them on your phone. Time to pretend this is normal. Bruce loves you, and sent you flowers to show appreciation instead of 'I'm sorry for your loss.' You hesitate before posting, afraid someone would interpret the flowers for something else, and rest the corner of your phone against your forehead.

Old Kara wouldn't have wanted to be memorialized with flowers and a funeral. "I want my body donated to science. I want to be able to help others." She said once when you were in high school. You remember trying to convince her to do something else, hearing about neo-funerals.

You decide to keep yourself busy the next day with Lucy as she stresses over the dinner Thursday. You have a couple of days to prepare yourself for a battle and these elegant dresses will be your armor. You don't want anything extravagant, knowing they'll pocket watch if you have anything that oozes money. Lucy however doesn't care as she picks her usual dresses that reveal your cleavage and have the most jewels and color. It does numb your mind as she and Sabrina mostly argue with themselves on what you should wear. You look at the gray sky in the living room, Gotham below, mind wandering.

How many times did you and Kara stare at the Tower on the way home from school and wonder what life could be like? She should be here. She should have been able to live... You hold back tears when you realize the conversation has dulled, eyes on you. You blink as you glance between the confused women.

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