My sins (on hold)

Research

The ride was silent. Dante never said a word, letting me stew in my thoughts. I occasionally glanced at Dante and noticed how his hands were gripping the wheel too tightly and how his face was set in a blank tightness. 

Soon, Dante dropped me off, giving me a long hug. He pulled back and tucked a rebellious strand of hair behind my ear. His intense stare made me squirm underneath it. The tightness in his posture relaxed as he finally spoke, "you ever need anything. Anything. I will be there. All you have to do is ask."

I nodded, agreeing to his terms. He let me go and wordlessly watched my pull my stuff out from the trunk and walk towards the towering building, not wanting to believe that I was back here, alone again.

I rolled my shoulders back and entered the building. Students and professors crowded the hall. I pushed past them and marched straight to my home for now. I couldn't help taking a quick look at what was Caden's house. I doubt he's coming back. I didn't want to be alone.

I know I told him to stay behind, but a part of me wanted him to insist on coming. I shook my head, space was good, I needed some. I have to stop being a hypocrite.

The inside felt lonely and bland. I ignored the sinking feeling in my gut and unpacked my clothes to harshly shove into my closet. 

I forced myself to stop overthinking this situation. Nobody broke up with anyone, we weren't even together in the first place. We haven't even kissed. We have time.

I sent Caden a quick goodnight text before I sank into my bed.

The next day was spent thoroughly cleaning my small home to distract myself from the sweet texts from both Caden and Dante. Ronan had called and we had blissfully talked about absolutely nothing before I made up an excuse to leave. 

I forced myself to bed early so then I would be well rested for school the next day. 

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I shot upright and shut off the blaring alarm. That was something I didn't miss. I threw together a comfy outfit for my early day. I had set my alarm extra early for a reason, to research. The one thing that's been made extremely clear to me is the fact that I know nothing about this new world.

I made the long trek up the three flights of stairs to get to my destination, the library. I pushed open the heavy metal door to the an enormous space filled with long rows of bookshelves. They were so high, there was a ladder attached to each shelf so someone could climb up and grab a book at the top.

I shuttered at the thought of being so high above the ground on a rickety, skinny ladder.

"Good morning," a high pitched, older women chirped, "do you know what you're looking for? Can I help you find anything?"

Her friendly personality caused me to blurt out exactly what I was looking for. "Yes, actually. I'm looking for any information on all the different species." 

She seemed confused at first and I had to embarrassingly explain my very limited knowledge of everything. She smiled, staying professional. "Oh, of course. Right this way, I'll pick out some books I think you'll find helpful. You find a seat at one of the tables and I'll be over shortly."

I smiled and thanked her and went to grab a seat in the corner of the library. The frail women shuffled over a moment later, carrying multiple heavy looking textbooks in her arms. She dropped them on the table and they made a large thunk, echoing throughout the empty library.

She put her hands on her hips, proudly looking over her bounty before smiling down at me, "if you need anything else just let me know."

"I will, thank you."