Things We Didn't Say

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MIA

"How are your parents?" I ask. It's been an hour since Kian and I woke up from our nap. All this time, we have been talking about what happened in our lives in the past three years. 

"They're fine." He replies like he's bored. 

"I'm guessing they are not cool with your 'career choice'." I raise my eyebrows at him. He scoffs and looks away.

"It doesn't matter." From what I remember, his relationship with his dad and his older brother was not the best and I'm assuming it's still that way. But, I remember, his mother was lovely. I never really met her, but Kian used to tell me how his mother liked me in pictures and asked Kian about me a lot.

He continues, "After all, my father wouldn't have been happy even if I was doing some respectable job. I will just never be enough for him..." He looks away. I move closer to him, gently holding his hand and drawing circles on the back of his palm. 

"I mean, I'm going to college. And, I know that no parents would want their child to be a criminal, but, I didn't have a choice, and they know it. This is not the life I chose..." He runs his free hand through his hair and tugs at them. 

"Why can't you quit, Kian?" I ask.

"I can't. It's not that easy. Quitting in this world means betrayal. If I quit then they will kill me, and maybe my family too. And..." He drifts off before looking at me with knitted eyebrows. " I'm afraid they may come after you. I can't afford that, Mia." He breaks away from me completely, turning his back to me, and rubs his temples. 

"It's all my fault, Mia. I shouldn't have been so selfish. I should've always kept my distance. It's all my fault..." 

I sigh before moving closer to him and hug him from behind, resting my cheek on his shoulder. 

"Do you know why I cried when I saw you at school yesterday?" 

"Because you don't like my face?" His reply makes me laugh. 

"Aww Kian you're so stupid." He turns around and faces me with knitted eyebrows.

"You are not that ugly." I chuckle and he smiles too. "I cried because I wasn't strong enough to face you after all these years. All those painful memories of our separation came crashing down on me. And my emotions just kicked in. I couldn't control myself. I was confused about how you just appeared in front of me, out of nowhere, and at the same time I felt guilty because deep down I didn't want you to go away at that moment."

I didn't realize that a stubborn tear had leaked out of my eyes until I felt Kian's thumb rubbing it away. I smile at him. 

"Mia, I can't tell you how sorry I am for what I did, and-" I place my finger over his lips.

"Shhhhh. I know you're sorry. Stop apologizing for it over and over again. But what I didn't get is why you lied." His frown deepens upon hearing my words. I nod.

"I knew you didn't cheat on me in high school. You just put that up so that you would have an easy excuse to break up with me. But why did you do it? I still don't know..." His eyes widen as I speak. 

"You knew that was all fake? Me cheating on you?" He asks, bewildered.

"Of course, silly. I knew it from the beginning." 

"How? Who told you?" 

"No one." I shrug.

"Then how?" 

"As I said before, you suck at acting, Kian." 

"So all this while you knew that I didn't cheat on you?" 

"Yes." 

"If you knew, then why didn't you confront me?" He asks.

"Because you didn't want me to be with you. Your eyes said it all, that you want to end things. I didn't want to force you and neither was I strong enough at that time to fight for love."

"I-I can't believe this." He sucks in a deep breath.

"But why did you do it? Why did you leave me at that time?" I finally ask.

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