Resisting Rosaleen (18+)

19

I phoned the first person who came to my mind to fetch me: Jared. I looked like a mess but it wasn't as if Jared had not yet seen me post-breakdown, hungover, and injured. He was quick to respond, not even asking any questions and simply said I'm on my way. Either I did sound as broken as I felt or his protective instincts kicked in.

My own car stopped in front of me. Jared was in his house clothes, even to his slippers, but had worn a thick brown coat over. As soon as he got out, the said coat was shrugged off of his large frame and onto my body.

The man helped me to my feet and before I knew it, I was in the passenger seat and we were cruising out of the country club and into the highway. I had thrown my heels into the backseat. I folded my legs underneath me, the material of the dress wrinkling.

I could feel that Jared wanted to ask but either decided that it wasn't the time or completely backed out. I appreciated the silence. I wasn't sobbing but tears fell slowly, almost one by one, down my cheeks, destroying my makeup in the process. Some fell to my neck, wetting the collars of Jared's coat and the fabric of my dress.

He reached over and opened the compartment between us, revealing a box of tissues. It was almost funny if I wasn't so fucking miserable. I wiped my face.

We were quiet on the way home. It was nearly midnight and the road was fairly clear. Going home took only half the time as going out. The mansion was quiet with no one in sight outside which was good because I didn't need anyone else to see me the way I was.

Jared parked the car behind Wyatt's array of luxury automobiles. As soon as the headlights were off, we were engulfed in darkness and the silence became more silent.

"Thank you," I told Jared as I started to take his coat off.

"Just doing my job."

The tears have dried but I was equally still as sad. I handed Jared his coat. My next words reminded me of that time we were by the pool and I was also post-breakdown.

"It's beyond work hours. You should ask for a raise."

His laughter was short. He was still concerned or curious but I was leaning towards the latter.

"I'm concerned," he began, proving me wrong. "You're on this... spiral of emotions."

That was true. From his point of view in the limited instances he sees me, on time I'm sad, then I'm happy, worried, blank, sad again, happy, and the cycle goes on.

"But isn't that how teenage girls are supposed to be?" I tried to lighten it up.

"I guess." I couldn't see him clearly but I sensed him shrug, "I wouldn't know. Not yet, at least."

I shivered. "Just wear it for now," said Jared, pertaining to the coat. Maybe it was the emotional drain or actual tiredness, but I was beginning to feel feverish. I put the coat on again. If he was cold too, he didn't let me notice.

Although my big and warm bed was upstairs waiting for me, I felt comfortable in the car. In the darkness, I could cry as ugly as I wanted. And there was someone to keep me from stupid things.

I sighed. It was a heavy sigh. "The man that I want loves somebody else."

It was my story in a nutshell.

"And I want him to choose me." I was then realizing how stupid I sounded: wanting a man to choose a girl he barely knew over the woman he's married to.

"I want him to choose me. Even just a bit. Even just sometimes. But..." I stopped myself there, not wanting to give too much away.

"But?"

"I'm not used to not getting what I want. Also, I think he's changing me."

"Damn," he began, staring into nothing. "When I first met you, I didn't think you'd be the type to go this nuts for a guy. I thought it was the other way around."