Resisting Rosaleen (18+)

47

I took in the sight of Nikolas, regretful and in love—two things that mix like milk and soda. The urge to throw all rational thinking out the window and hug the man, kiss, and hold him in my bed was compelling.

I wasn't able to stop the spill of words from my mouth, "If she didn't get pregnant..."

"I'd be fixing the divorce papers right now, " he answered silently. I felt what he felt when he said it—regret. The sting of a simple what if.

"I wouldn't be on my way to New York," I quietly added.

"No," he shifted in his seat, leaning forward and crossing his arms, "It's what's best for you and I would've still made you go."

"And you'd come with me?" Wow, Rosa, wanting for the shit to hit the fan?

"What do you think?" a small smile appeared on his face. It was as tender as it can get.

Did he love me enough to hop on a plane and greet a new place?

"If you really love me, you wouldn't be here because you know it'll hurt me more," I spoke.

"Maybe I really love you and I can't stay away even if it's risky."

"You sound like the old Rose," I commented, "Somewhat selfish, very persistent."

He sighed, "learned a lot from that girl."

My eyes never left Mr. Camillo and I never wanted them to. If the end of us is really coming in three days, I wanted to memorize his every detail.

"Or maybe I'm not as selfish as we think," his voice was almost a whisper and I almost didn't hear it, "Maybe I know Rosaleen enough to know that she can be fixed by the things that broke her."

"Sounds stupid and paradoxical, don't you think?"

"We're stupid, aren't we?" he calmly said.

I huffed and sunk further into the mattress, "I hate being stupid. You should go and let me be smart for a change."

"Is that really what you want, Rose?" he sounded sad again and it made me sad, "Because I don't wanna regret not taking the chances I never took. In this case, it would be spending this time with you. I thought you need this too."

"You sound manipulative," I had to say.

That made him pause. His eyes fell to the floor in front of him before his lids fluttered close. Nikolas looked as if he was silently scolding himself.

It was like realization dawned upon him, "I do, don't I?" Nikolas raked his fingers through his hair.

I didn't reply and instead let my expression agree. My heart twisted as I watched him get to his feet with the most shameful look on his gorgeous face.

He's leaving. He's leaving again.

Regardless of the situation, I realized that it hurts each time Nikolas leaves.

He opened his mouth, about to speak, but closed it again. How much of a mess the man was became obvious when he hesitantly nodded his head and made his way to the door. Nikolas stopped just when his hand came in contact with the knob, "I'm sorry, Rosaleen. I won't bother you if you that's what you want. Goodnight."

Just a minute ago he was two meters away from me on the floor and now he's gone. Again.

I think I've ran out of tears because nothing fell. My numb hands searched the bedside table for my phone, scanning for a familiar name on my contacts list once I had it.

He answered after two rings. "Rosaleen It's way past your bedtime, malyshka."

With an exaggerated frown on my face, my back hit the mattress, "Why did you let Nick stay here?"