ReWrite The Stars (NaruSasu)

PTSD: Perspectives, Trauma, Sexuality, Decisions

[5515 words]

Naruto's POV

I try my hardest to get up, to find my strength but it's no use. My body won't respond to my needs no matter how hard I try. I need to help him. We need to get out of here alive.

"Naruto! Get up already!"

"D-Don't you see i'm trying S-Sasuke..."

He just grunts and continues defending me as I put every ounce of energy I have to stand back up but the more I try the more I fail. It feels like I took the most craziest drug to knock me out the way my vision is fading.

What was minutes only felt like seconds when I finally open my eyes. It's cold, Dark, And most of all.... Wet? I lift my hand up to my face and it's completely covered in.... blood?

All of a sudden I feel a heavy weight shift on top of me. As I prop my self up on my elbows I look down and I see... Sasuke?? He's shaking, trembling, and extremely cold. His body feels like ice. My eyes start to water as I lay here in utter fear and shock. He finally lifts his head and looks up at me with the little strength he has left. His eyes start to water as well as he grabs the sides of my orange jacket hanging on for dear life.

"N-Naruto.... Why?? W-Why didn't you... h-help me...."

"S-Sasuke I-I"

"I c-can't believe I'm really d-dying... for a loser.... like you..."

He coughs up a huge amount of blood on me as I continue to cry uncontrollably completely speechless. All the senbons in his body fall out simultaneously and his whole body is now filled with holes as his blood pours out like fountains covering the area around us.

"This.... T-This is all y-your fault... Usura...tonkachi..."

He finally collapses and his breathing stops causing me to scream and cry out in agony. I grab his body and pull him up towards me hugging him excruciatingly tight as I continue to scream his name. Yelling out "I'm sorry" non stop.

Haku appears out of the darkness surprising me because I forgot he was even here. He grabs Sasuke by the hair on his head and yanks him off of me. Then in once swift motion before I could even react he slices my neck.....

Causing me to wake up from this hell.

I shoot up from my pillow gasping for air as sweat trickles down both my temples. Once I finally get my breathing under control I squeeze my chest and sob uncontrollably. My heart is in so much pain and agony that I can't bare it. I bring my knees up to my chest and cry even louder.

It really is all my fault. I should've been the one to protect him. If I wasn't so weak I wouldn't be having these nightmares every night ever since we got back from the land of waves. I know he's alive and there should be no reason for me to worry, but what if on our next missions this happens again?

All because i'm not strong enough to do something about it. I keep telling myself i'll get stronger and that I won't let something like that happen again but that's easer said than done. That dream was proof that no matter how hard I try I just couldn't get back up.

I hate this. I hate it so much. Constantly living in fear of something... happening to him. All because I didn't have the strength so save him. To help him. Even though he's my rival and he's somebody I want to beat. It's more than that. I want to fight by his side as well, I never want him to leave me behind. Not in the after life and not in real life either.

I think Sasuke one day has the potential to truly become my best friend ever. Only time will tell though. Since he is the only one after Iruka sensei to actually accept me for who I am, there's no way we wouldn't be able to become closer.