Tʜᴇ ᴡᴏʟғ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀɴᴅs『ᴛⁱᵍʰⁿᵃʳⁱ ˣ ᴡᵒˡᶠ!ᴍʀ』

XVI

Tᴏ ʀᴇᴄᴏɴᴄɪʟᴇ

M/n nods his head and leads Tighnari into his home to take a seat for a while.
"Look, I'm sorry. I never meant to make you feel like there was something wrong with your sex life. Everyone has their views from mine. It was wrong of me."

"Tig, it's fine...I couldn't care less about how you see me but that still doesn't mean your words didn't poke at an insecurity. Though we don't want a relationship, we still wish to be held as if we were in one. But recently, I can tell that Kaveh is developing a true soft spot for Alhaitham as of late and Aether with Wanderer...I'm not sad or even bitter that they're finding love and leaving me behind. I'm used to it and I know they'll always be my friends."Though M/n said that, there was pain in his eyes, a deep fear of being alone once more. Pain from both he and Yamanu.

Tighnari didn't know what to say at first but suddenly he saw something that made his heart pound harshly in his chest. An image of another overlapping with M/n's appearance. Both had equally sad eyes paired with a fake smile.
"Will you be okay when they pursue love? Because your smile isn't reaching your eyes. They seem empty of happiness and full of sorrow."

"I don't have the right to allow my emotions to dictate their actions. It's not that I'm attached, trust me I was very clear in that. I just...It feels like I'm watching everyone around me fall in love, something I'm too afraid to do. That's fine, regardless It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Right?"Tighnari clenches his fist while listening to M/n. Why did this hurt him to listen to more than it seemed to hurt M/n saying it?

His tone wasn't bitter or even envious, it was just full of melancholy.
"All fun comes to an, gotta accept it and move on."

"Doesn't it hurt? Even if it's just a little bit?"The wolf shuddered his shoulders, truth be told he was experiencing an emotional block that was slowly starting to break.
"Tig please–"

"Shouldn't you tell them that your feelings were left behind?!"

"Tig—"

"That you love them—"

"TIGHNARI! STOP!!"M/n's plea came out louder than he expected, his resolve was nothing but a broken wall as tears lined his lower eyelids.
"Why do you care so much? Don't you have your own love life to worry about? For fucks sake can't you tell it hurts enough?!"M/n runs his hand through his hair with a shaking hand.
"Then why sit here and suffer?"

"Because...I'll suffer even more if I say how I felt but not for them. No matter how hard I try to stray away from a certain bundle of emotions they just pull me back...When I...."M/n mutters something under his breath, it is so quiet that Tighnari can't hear it.
"I can't and I won't ruin others' happiness to make myself feel better. That's not who I am nor will it ever be."As these words fall from his lips, so do tears fall from his eyes.
"M/n...What emotions? For who if not Aether or Kaveh?"

"....I don't think I should tell you that but I ask that you be a shoulder for me to lean on. You don't always have to be there for me but at least I know you'll comfort me when you can."Tighnari hugged the taller man, it was felt that he needed this more than anything. A voice enters Tighnari's ears, it is calm, tearful, and full of regret.
"Please, never make my mistakes..."
M/n timidly wraps his arms around Tighnari, leaning to better hold the fennec fox to feel true comfort from the source of his pain.
"I'm sorry..."

"It's okay Tighnari."M/n utters as he slowly pulls away from the sought-after warmth, he can't bring himself to hold the male any longer fearful of crossing a boundary or being taken out of context.
"I should get going, the others are probably waiting for me. I'm glad we had this talk, I'll see you later."

"Yeah, maybe then you can teach me about life in the sands?"Tighnari suggested with a small smile that was surprisingly returned by M/n.