life through my eyes

damaged

I am like most people we are damaged we all have our own path with our own story.

this is my past

as children we hear our parents telling us stories about dashing princes and beautiful princesses being locked away with scary dragons.

monsters.

we would tell our parents to look under our bed or in our closets in hopes to scare them away.

As  children we didn't know that all of our monsters would creep into our heads and make a fight with us.

sadly some people cant fight a lot of monsters at once, some can.

I have came from a hard family that was strong even still those monsters crept into my mind.

matter of fact I still deal with these monsters on a daily basis.

the thing with damaged goods is you can either return them or fix them for your own satisfaction.

when I was seven it was parents day my mom was busy working.

my uncle took me as my father figure, I got bullied for it.

I loved spending time with him.

your always told as a child

"don't talk to strangers"

the monsters in my head soon became my friends.

 after countless doctors appointments in our local doctors.

 I was diagnosed with depression and they basically told me to lose weight.

I didn't just get bullied because my uncle was my father figure but because my eyes was slightly turned. 

I was slightly bigger and chubbier than the other kids.

every dream and inspiration became less and less of a reality until I hit 16 that is.

*if I could speak to my younger self I would tell her to lift her head up and be do proud of herself*

don't get me wrong I haven't changed much. I am a bigger woman and have learned to embrace my curves. I tend to go on long walks to get some exercise but I think it has more to do with head peace.

when I started secondary school my anger always got the best of me.

 the only things that could calm me down was four things you wouldn't even think about giving a thirteen year old now.

note pad 

pen 

good book 

earphones 

that was and is my life.

you wouldn't hear from me if I didn't have these things I would have lost the plot a lot of the time.