Love Letter

Fear.....

June 18th.....

Ali, I'm sorry.

I've tried to respect your wishes. I've tried to accept I totally messed up ... no actually, if I'm honest I royally FUCKED up ... what we were beginning to have.

You didn't reply. And I know I said I wouldn't push it. But, the thing is Alison...

I miss your humour, I miss our chats.

I miss you.

More than I ever thought possible for someone I'd only just got to know.  And the thought of never hearing you laugh at me again? Don't. Just don't go there.

Please Ali, give me another chance? Luke has done everything he can to cheer me up, but he's running out of tasteless jokes and extremely poor movie choices. We even watched re-runs of Agents of Shield the other night. That's how bad it's getting. 

Anyway, cutting to the chase... Ali I will be home in two weeks. Can... can we meet? Like you suggested? Please?
Just let me know where, let me know when and I'll be there. I promise. Without fail. For as long - or as short - as you'd like.  Tea, coffee, dinner, fourteen course banquet, the choice is yours darling. 

Just please, let me know that you're ok.

As I said, I am, and always will be,
Your Tom xxxx

This time, there hadn't been twenty attempts. This time, he knew exactly what he wanted to say. This time, he wouldn't let her down.

He walked down to the reception and handed them the letter. 

"Tomorrow ok for this one, Mr H, mail has been picked up for today?" The young man behind the desk smiled at him as he took the envelope.

"That be fine, thanks, David." Tom smiled as he watched him drop it into the mailbox and then went to walk away. Another day wouldn't make a difference, not when he felt like he was only postponing the inevitable anyway.

David's voice called out across the lobby, breaking into his thoughts.

"Oh, Mr H? This came for you earlier. I think it was forgotten about in the shift change. I really am so sorry."

Tom smiled as he walked back, "No problem, these things......" he trailed off to silence as he looked at the envelope. "Happen."

It had been redirected, seemingly at Luke's request while they were gone, hence had taken an extra week to arrive. 

Alison had written back after all. 

He paused, should he take back his letter? Maybe he was about to make the ultimate fool of himself. No, on balance, if he'd been a few minutes earlier, the letter would have been gone, and he'd have had no choice.

Slipping the letter into his pocket, he went back to his room.  As he reached the door, he reached out to open it and then stopped.  Taking a breath, he decided not to go in.  Instead, he turned on his heel and went up to the rooftop bar.

Walking out into the San Diego sunshine, he chose a table overlooking the seafront. He'd just settled when the waiter walked over.

"Beer, please?" He smiled, and the waiter nodded and retreated. Tom waited, drumming his fingers on the glass topped table distractedly.

The sea sparkled with little dancing points of light. The birds wheeled and dived, the local shrimp boats returning to the harbour round the corner. As they arrived, the catch they didn't want - fish and so forth - was returned to the sea.  This was the easy meal the pelicans and gulls looked forward to.

Across the bay, the US Navy air station - made famous by Top Gun - was winding down for the day. The last planes returned to base, the sound of the afterburners dying away. Tom smiled. He liked Top Gun. Maybe he could rewatch it one day. Practice the cheesy pickup lines. He knew exactly who on.

With a nervous sigh, he pulled the letter out of his jeans pocket. It was slightly crumpled now, and he ran his fingers over it, trying to straighten it out a little. As he did so, he felt something inside it. His brow furrowed with puzzlement.

Before he had a chance to ponder any further, the waiter returned with his beer. 

"Thanks!" He signed for it and was once again alone.  Looking at his fate, enclosed in pale cream, he took a long slug of the beer.  This wasn't helping.

Putting the bottle to the side, he picked up the letter. 

"Ok Ali, tell me the worst." He closed his eyes and ripped open the envelope.  Extracting the contents, he opened his eyes and smiled. Whatever the letter said, she hadn't completely hated him, it seemed.

The little lump he'd felt through the paper? A 'loveheart' sweetie. Beloved sweetie from their shared childhood. Each had a little slogan. This one? This one made him smile.

All it said was, "Be mine."

Picking up the reply, he began to read.  By the time he'd got as far as the end of the first paragraph, he wasn't smiling anymore. By the time he finished the letter, he wasn't sure he he ever would again, his chest aching with the knot of emotion inside.

A knot that would stay with him until he could hold her in his arms and tell her he yes, he would be hers for as long as she wanted.

Tears in his eyes, he picked up his phone. 

"Luke? Hi. Yes, I need a favour." He paused, gathering himself. "I need to go home. Yes, but that's not soon enough. I need to go home as soon as possible."

Putting the phone down, he reached over and sank the rest of his beer.  Taking a last look at the view, he stood up.

"I'm coming, Ali. Hang on, darling. I'm coming home to you."

He turned. He had packing to do. Tonight.