Love Letter

Resting at last.....

Finally, the sun peeked above the horizon, pale and sleepy. The sky tinged with peach as another day began.

Tom looked down at her, hardly daring to breathe. She was quiet, oh so quiet. The night had been long and dark and very, very frightening.

Things had deteriorated very, very quickly. Sepsis set in notoriously and frighteningly quickly and took no prisoners. By the time he'd come back from fetching his snack, she was surrounded by staff, on an antibiotic drip, and, worst of all? Unconscious. She'd succumbed to infection, a fact subsequently confirmed by the blood tests.

Tom felt the world drop from underneath him as he watched them work. Someone, he wasn't sure who, guided him away to the relative's waiting room. He sat, for what seemed like hours but in reality was only a few minutes, as they made her comfortable.

Julie reappeared and came to sit with him.

"Im not going to lie Tom, she's gravely ill. IF she fights, IF she has anything left to fight with, she'll make it. I warn you though, there are no guarantees. Even for someone who hasn't just come through major surgery it can be a fight. For Alison? With all she's fighting on the sidelines? Well, you're an intelligent man...." she paused as she let him take it all in.

"Dear God. She could...die?" he whispered.

"I can't say she definitely won't. But by the same token? Don't let her give up." She patted his hand, "its not over Tom, you two have a lot of life to live. Just encourage her to fight for it ok?"

Tom nodded and stood, taking a deep breath. His newest friend, his beautiful friend, his... yes, one day his beautiful GIRLfriend, needed him. With renewed determination, he walked through.

"I'm back, love and this time? I'm not leaving you when you need me most."

Ali had tossed and moaned, bathed in sweat, struggling for every last breath. Occasionally, her eyes had opened, and she had looked at him. Unseeing in her fever, she was blind and fearful. Delirious, mumbling incoherently, the infection raged on against the antibiotics.

All the while, he'd held her. Soothed her. Murmured words of love and peace to her. Words he had never envisaged he would be saying outside of a movie studio. After all, this wasn't real. It couldn't be. If it was, then it was too horrible to contemplate.

"Darling, I'm here. Shhhhh Ali, it's ok, I'm here, my love. I will always be here."

He felt his heart tearing in two. He had to his amazement, fallen in love with her so quickly, it was almost impossible to contemplate her leaving again, but... "If it's too hard, my love, " he'd paused, swallowing deeply as the emotion overwhelmed him. "If you need to let go...." he stroked her forehead, still drenched from the fever.

Gently, he kissed it. "Its mad, its not how I ever imagined, but I love you, Ali.." he crumpled against her.

"Please, my darling, please, please stay. Please just a little more fight. If I could fight it for you.... if my love was the medicine, you would always have enough of...." he begged as he dissolved into tears, his chest heaving.

The night wore on, only Julie coming and going. Checking drips, checking monitors, checking Tom was ok. Ali clung on. Tom held on.

At 2.30 a.m., the nurse came in to do her observations. "If you want to take a break Tom, I'll stay with her. You must be exhausted." She smiled gently, putting a hand on his arm.

Tom looked at Ali, who was muttering incoherently again, almost inaudibly. Shaking his head, he stayed resolutely where he was. "No, if ... if she ... I need to be here. She doesn't want to be alone."