Miss You Already...

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"September 2nd.....

Darling,

I know I only left two days ago, but it already seems like too long. Are you ok? Did Bobby settle with you? He seemed to be quite happy all this week, so I'm sure the two of you will get on just fine. He's under strict instructions to love on you at any given opportunity, but also to remember who his Dad is. If I get a WHIFF of him trying to steal your heart, I'll turn him into the world's hairiest snake!!!!!

Seriously though Ali, if there's anything you need to ask, or just fancy a change of face, phone Mum. She'll be round like a shot. I wouldn't be surprised if she finds some excuse or other to come round and see you anyway. I've been warning her off for weeks. Not because, dear heart, I don't want you to meet her, oh no. I just want you to be firing on all cylinders, believe me, she's lovely but God is she hard work in full flow!!

Grown men have been known to take Holy Orders in a silent Brotherhood just to get away from her relentless chatter!

All joking aside love, I really wrote because I know in a couple of days it's Round Three. Possibly the last one - in a good way I mean. The last sickness, the last fatigue, the last ulcers..... the first day of the rest of your - our - lives. I know I've said it a million times, and no doubt will say it a million more, but I'm so sorry. I really am. I will spend eternity trying to make it up to you. I promise.

Now, sad elephant in the room evicted, what are you up to today? Here, it's raining and blowing what my Dad would call a "hoolie". I have absolutely no desire to go out, let alone go running. Can you think of a decent excuse that doesn't involve me cutting off both my legs? Answers on a postcard - or as they used to say on children's tv - the back of a stuck down envelope!!!

Looking out the rain spattered window, I can just about make out the Belvedere Castle in Central Park. We're only here for two or three days and they're filled to the top so no sightseeing. Not that I really want to do any on my own, especially not there. I don't think Luke is really the romantic type to be honest, ha ha ha!! Maybe we could come back, together? Have a think about it love, maybe there will be a special occasion soon that we could mark with a trip here for a few days?"

He put down his pen and smiled. Yes, he could have called or facetimed, but this? A letter? Was how they'd first connected after all and it was ideal. It allowed him to savour the words, choose exactly the right ones and commit them to paper for her. No mistaking meaning, no slips of the tongue. This time, he knew, every word would count.

He took a swallow of the tea sitting beside him, smiling at the memory of that day with the ginger tea, and resumed.

"So, when I come back, you will be well rested after your latest escapade into the world of hard drugs. Maybe we could take a holiday? I'll ask Emma or Mum to look after our little man and we can go somewhere warm and beachy. I have a few ideas, you just have to pick one. When I know exactly when I'm being released from Press Jail, I'll give you the options so you can tie a yellow ribbon... Sorry, got all cheesy country song there, I meant so I can get it all booked. And no. You're not paying for a thing. I KNOW you will say you don't want to appear to scrounge off me, and I also know you are perfectly capable of organising a trip, but just for once love? Indulge me? Thank you.

Now, serious head on for a minute ok? No, I mean it, stop smirking at the page!

I'm sitting looking out the window at the rain and I feel like crying too. I miss you darling. More than I can ever tell you, either in person or in this letter. I know that Monday is going to be shit, Tuesday is going to be even more shit and Wednesday? Well, it's just going to be the kind of day where you want to give up. Then you'll come home and wait. Wait for the puking and the fainting and the ulcers and all that other crap you're so brave at putting up with.

This is the serious bit love. Please promise me one thing. You'll keep fighting? For Bobby's sake if not mine? He loves you more than anyone he's ever loved before, or will again. But I'm sure you know that, don't you darling.

You will not be alone. I have asked - no I TOLD - Emma to come and look after you. Whoa there, slow down with the complaints - don't, just don't ok? She is more than happy to come over. She wants to help, after all (and here's where the serious bit goes out the window again) someone willing to take me on deserves a medal and not just their tea made for them!!!

She said she'll text you - I gave her your number, I hope that's ok - and chat, not just rock up on your doorstep like some avenging angel. Please love, let her help? For me?

Right, in the tradition we started what seems a lifetime ago but is really only a few months - jeez even that is a while eh? - it's Quote time.... So, where's this from and can you complete it? When I read it, it seemed so appropriate for you and me...

"Love comes quietly, finally,

drops about me, on me,

in the old ways,

I'm sorry Ali, time to go. Hopefully this gets to you in a couple of days, please write back? Not that I don't love hearing your beautiful voice, but this? This way, I can keep you and re-read you as often as I want. When I'm happy, when I'm sad, when I'm lonely and just when I want to pretend you are with me.

Give Bobs a big hug and kiss for me and tell him I'll see him soon(ish) with a juicy bone.

All my love darling always,

your Tom xxx"

As ever, it was sealed in it's envelope with a soft kiss. Then he pulled on his jacket and walked down to the lobby. Handing the envelope to the concierge to post, he turned and called over to the man sitting poring over his phone emails.

"Come on you. Since I don't have my girl, you'll have to do. Romantic pizza for two and a movie?" He grinned as Luke rolled his eyes.

"God help me, this is going to be a long eight weeks!" Luke moaned, and then laughed. "Come on then, since it's a date I want popcorn and coke. The works!"

As they left the building the letter was already winging it's way into the US Postal system. When the reply came, it wouldn't be the one Tom was ever expecting.

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