Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Well I know I'm Not Alright

            "Mmm." The blaring sun from the window peaked its way beneath my eye lids and woke me up. I flipped over to the read the clock that claimed to be 9am. Instantly I smiled, realizing I got an average 13 hours of sleep (or at least average to me.) The good vibes shot through my body and sent me on my way down stairs to greet my parents.

"Mom? Dad?" I ask, while looking around. Upon not seeing their cars in the drive way, it came to my realization that it was a Thursday morning and going to work was still a thing for most people. I made my way into the kitchen and brewed up a couple of cups of coffee for myself. Being friends with Billie was great, but I think Mike Dirnt would really appreciate my coffee obsession.

Ah, Billie Joe. Last night was perfect in every way. It was a dream! I went to sleep knowing that I was not conscious, and I woke up in my bed, completely refreshed. Maybe Billie was right, maybe things would only get better from here.

Once it hit 1pm, I began feeling really fidgety and unstable. Usually being alone for a half a day was just great. Having control over what you can eat, watch, listen to and do were just the greatest benefits of parents working in the summer and having time off. However, I was feeling really insecure by myself. I found myself missing Billie a lot and wanting to sleep whenever I got the chance. Even after my insomnia for four days, I didn't feel the need to take another nap. I tried of course, but my body was just not having it. My phone laid on the couch besides me, I grabbed it and went through my contacts on people I haven't seen in while. Eventually I found the name Danielle. She was one of my best friends throughout elementary school, and nowadays we only meet up every so often, but when we do, it's like nothing ever changed. I gave her a call and set up a time to meet.

"Everything okay Lay?" Danielle asked sincerely. We went up to Green Hill which was a park near the both of us. When we were younger it's where we had soccer games and played at the playground. Nowadays it's where we watch the sunset, blast some music and smoke a blunt.

"There's something I want to tell you, but I really don't want you to laugh at me."

"Well, is it funny?" I giggled at her response.

"I wouldn't say it's funny, it's just kinda strange...and it's easy to assume everything I'm about to say is made up and exaggerated, but really it's not. So just, hear me out please."

She peered into my eyes and nodded in acknowledgement. Her attention then went towards the pond, "I won't laugh."

"Hmm, what's the best way to say this? Should I tell you all the details or give you a general statement on what's been happening?" I attempt to work things out.

"I'm a big girl," she takes a drag of the blunt. "I might be able to piece things together if you give me the big picture first."

"You wish. I mean, the best way to put it is my mind has been playing some major tricks on me. I've been having a hard time telling the difference between what's real and what's not."

"You tellin me you're a schizophrenic?" She immediately replied jokingly.

"Well, the doctor hasn't ruled it out. If anything, he told me it's a possibility."

She began coughing intensely and passed me the blunt.

"Wait, you're not fucking serious!"

"I am, actually."

"I guess 20 isn't old enough to be considered a big girl then."