Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Connecting the Dots

            "Um...doctor...?"

"Yes, Dr. Mahoney. Can I help you with something, Layla?"

"I'm...I'm feeling kind of alone. Can you keep me company?"

"Sure. Would you like me to invite your family and friends back to your room?"

"No! I mean...no, not yet. I, I just want to talk to you. I have some questions."

"I'll be right over. Is there anything I can grab for you on the way?"

"No thanks."

"Give me five minutes."

"Thank you."

I slowly hung up the phone on the nightstand beside me. It had been an hour since I was told the news, and I stopped crying only a few minutes ago. It took me that long for me to realize that the only thing worse than not having Billie was also not having anyone to talk about it with.

A few minutes later Dr. Mahoney entered the room with a smile and a glass of milk that he handed to me.

"This will help give your bones some calcium. I thought you might need the extra strength."

I smiled in thanks and accepted his offer. He wasn't too bad looking for a middle aged man. If anything, he reminded me a bit of Billie. Not appearance wise, for this doctor had a youngish looking face with a head of silver hair. It was just comforting to be able to talk to someone who had that same wisdom and experience as Billie had.

"How can I be of assistance to you, Layla?" He asked sweetly.

"Thanks for coming," I ignored his question. "I just didn't want to be overwhelmed by a room filled with family and friends who had just as hard a time of controlling their emotions as I do."

"That's understandable," he chuckled.

I glared down at my cup of milk, clenching it between my hands and hoping that some answers would swirl on the top layer. The feeling of vulnerability swarmed over me, leaving me with a cold emptiness inside.

"Doc, I've never felt so...so...weak." It came out as a stutter but took nearly all of my inner strength.

"That's normal, Layla. You've been in a comatose state for two weeks."

"No," my head peered up to his eye level. "Sure my body feels pretty terrible, but that's not what I mean. Emotionally, mentally...I feel so empty inside. Numb. Like everything I ever knew was a lie."

"You must have experienced a long term dream in your state of unconsciousness, did you not?"

"I did! And it was the most realistic vision I could have ever gone through. Time was parallel, people and places were exactly the same...everything matched up. Looking back on it now, it's scary to think of how similar life was for me during that dream."

"Science has gone over mountains trying to figure out how the mind operates when the body is unconscious, and every case that's been studied is different from the next. Your brain must be very sharp to be able to create an exact replica of your reality and cause you to believe you were pursuing those very actions."

"I suppose," I acknowledged while taking a sip of milk. "It's just, everything is different now." My head peeked towards the window to catch a glimpse of the city outside. "The sun doesn't seem as bright as it used to. The people aren't as lovely. The air isn't as comforting. Everything just feels musky and cold."