Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Rage & Love

"What the fuck?" I muttered. "WhAt ThE fUcK?!" I dropped my phone beside me and began crying harder than before. "BILLIE!" I screamed at the ceiling in tears. How could have this happened? What could have possibly caused this to happen?

The album was still blasting, bleeding into Are We the Waiting?

"This dirty town, was burning down in my dreams."

I wish. I wish it had. I wish I had. I can't take this anymore.

"Did you hear that?" My father is shouting from downstairs. "She's so fucked up she's calling out his name! As if this Billie character was going to save her from going crazy!"

"I can't do this," I sob to myself. "I can't be here."

I had already taken an Adderall today, but I rummaged through my case and took another. My biggest dream was that it would numb me to the bone, giving me enough concentration to escape subtly. The drug test had already been taken, so at this point, I could care less about what I was ingesting. I grabbed some clothes for the night, in case I wouldn't come back, and threw them into my Under Armour backpack. I snatched the rest of my pills, my phone & charger, and a few other small things to help get me through the day.

Once everything was all set, I opened my bedroom window and snuck out onto the ledge. My music was still blaring as a way to keep my parents distracted. The last words I heard were the classic "Rage & Love, story of my life."

The humidity was overbearingly thick and noticeable, being fueled by the scalding sun. With each step taken, I could feel the emotion disappear into a place where I would probably never see it again. For once, everything felt rather peaceful. It was the first time for a while where my senses had felt stronger again.

Expressions of people on the street seemed more shocked and reserved than usual. What did they have to be upset about? Here we are, on a beautiful hot summer day, and everyone outside looks all cranky and pissed off. People need to be way more accepting and thankful of what they've got.

I began walking faster to try and surpass the suburbia around me. It was rather annoying to see the same people every day doing the same shit as if they cared. The only time you'd see them is if they were watering their gardens or working on their yards. Not a single wave to me. Not a smile or a quick conversation. Literally anything simple like that could bring me a little spark of joy, but no...we all live in Massachusetts. We have a rep to protect. Massholes.

"Layla! Where are you going?"

I quickly flung myself around, expecting to see Damion or someone in the distance.

Who I saw instead of him made me go into a panic attack.

"Whoa whoa whoa calm down!"

I had fallen to the ground and had to struggle to breathe. The heat rose up from my core and caused me to start coughing and choking on air.

"Layla, fuck! Calm down, damn it!"

"This can't be happening," I gasp for air.

"Everything's okay, Lay. Everything's okay." His arm patted me on the shoulder for comfort.

"Is it? Is it really?" I took in a deep breath and managed to look into his crystal green eyes. "How are you here right now?"

He extended his arm out for me to grab.

"What do you mean? I thought you'd be happy to see me!"

I cocked my head and raised my eyebrows.

"I swear I was awake. I swear I was awake. I was in my room, freaking out about the phone thing, and I ran away. I ran away."

"You don't have to repeat everything, sweetie. I heard you the first time," he winks.