Brute's Paradise

Chapter 32 - "Every coin has two sides..."

"Since my childhood, I used to see our parents fighting. They started fighting and abusing each other after every little thing. They used to fight at the dining table, they used to fight during our school time and it continued after we came back. Only fight, abuse and shouting. Dhruv and I were too small to understand the reasons. For us, their quarrels became a habit and a mundane course. We started thinking that as if it's a rule of marriage. Although our mother never raised her hand on their children Dad was not that much generous. To be precise, he mostly beat me as compared to Dhruv. You know that I am only a year older than my brother. However, I always had a notion that as I am the older one maybe for that reason Dad is a bit stricter and harsher towards me. I never thought that it could have some other reason too."

Cabir finishes the line with a sigh. He is still kneeling on the floor and his eyes are fixed on Navya's face. However, she can feel that his concentration is not on her rather his mind is wandering on some array of memories. Some seconds of dead air pass on and Navya breaks it finally,

"What was that reason?"

Her words break his reverie. Navya observes pain and discomfort in his eyes. it seems he is hesitant to open up further. Cabir gets up from the ground and walks towards the glass wall. His back is facing Navya. She can still see his clenched jaws.

"You don't have to tell if you are not comfortable..."

She mouths. Cabir slips his fisted hands into his pocket and counters,

"Nobody can be comfortable to reveal the secret of his birth. But I will have to tell the truth, otherwise, you will always have the notion that I used you for my benefit. Well, at the age of eleven, I came to know that Dhruv and I are uterine brothers. Means we have different fathers. My uncle, whose business we are running now was my biological father. My mother loved my uncle but he broke her trust. She was pregnant with me when my legal father married her. He knew this matter and I think he married her out of pity because his brother cheated her. Or maybe my uncle gave him money to settle his sin because my mother's husband used to be a greedy person. I am sure he showed this generosity in the return of money. My mother tried to forget her past and started her married life with a person who could never forget that his wife was not a virgin. He even tried to abort her first baby that is me but I was stubborn enough to mar his plan and was born amidst all adversity. Dhruv came just after a year. Initially, I couldn't understand why my father hates me so much. I mean he didn't even love his own blood but his hatred towards me was very transparent. He used to abuse me, beat me and scold me for no reason. That time my innocent mind tried to console my wounded heart that perhaps he is an angry man. Perhaps he doesn't know how to love and care. On the other hand, my mother couldn't save me from his rage as she was already indebted to him for using his surname. Years passed and I somehow learnt to co-exist with the fact that I am an unwanted soul. Dhruv and I always had a good bond because we both had each other to share our problems. Our parents were always busy in their disturbed world. Meanwhile, I came to know that my Dad is not actually my Dad. I still remember the words that he yelled to Mom. 'He is a bastard...like you are a whore. Consider yourself lucky that I still allow him to call me Dad. He should be killed inside your womb. God, why I missed the chance!' That day I learnt the actual reason for his hatred. He even tried to kill me before my birth. This truth shook me from the inside. I decided to run away. But after two days Dad died in an accident. Dhruv was with him and he said Dad fell in the river when they went fishing. He didn't know how to swim and drowned. Mom sent both of us to a boarding school in Panchgani. I found out later that my biological father I mean Uncle Pritam bore all the finances. Perhaps he tried to pay back his mistake or maybe he wanted me to become his heir as he was childless. He gave all his property to the one whom he denied once. What a game of time and circumstances!"