𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬? | rafe cameron

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟒

꧁🝮꧂

I mentally scream. My head is bloody pounding, it feels as if it has all morning. But it feels as if it got worse when officer Shoupe drove off, not even three minutes ago. Everyone has just stood here, I couldn't move either. And I knew why JJ was silted, but not Kiara and Pope, nor Heyward. They don't know about my Da— what he does. I never want them to know.

My throat is dry, and I swallow harshly, trying to make it better. That is until my eyes wander too JJ beside me, I could tell he was trying to hold his anger in. It would be okay.

He slowly unlocks our hands, whilst turning his back to Kiara, Pope, and Heyward, who were across from us. His breathing was heavy. And before I knew it he had his hands on the top of his head, over his red hat he's always wearing. He roughly takes it off, throwing it onto the rocky ground with a soft thud from the impact.

And I suck in a breath. "Shit!" JJ shouts. Whilst staggering forward. I shake my head, my feet carrying myself to him before I give it a second thought. God, my eyes burn.

He shakes his head repeatedly, whilst walking forwards, his trainers kicking the rocky dust. I stalk behind him. "Stop, please, don't bloody do this to yourself." I whisper. My heart was breaking into pieces.

We weren't far from our mates, but we were far enough to where they couldn't hear us. And I'm bloody thankful for that.

He turns around to face me in one swift move. And my face falls instantly when I see his. His bottom lip was on the verge of trembling, his blue ocean eyes were watering. He scrunched his nose up, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Don't do this, Mae mae?" He started, his voice breaking more word by word. "Don't fucking do this? Everything that happens to you, hurts me, okay? It physically fucking hurts me. My heart— it fucking feels like it will fall out of my chest, every time I know you're not by me, that you are there." He continued.

And I blink, multiple times to make sure I'm not crying. 'There,' at my Da's. And my heart thumps harshly against my chest. It hurts to see him like this, and it hurts even more to know it is because of me.

My throat bobs slightly, "I'm here, though. I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere. I'll be okay. I'm always okay." I try to reassure him. But I wasn't even sure if I'd be okay myself, everything bloody hurts.

My chest.

My heart.

My eyes.

My head.

My cheek, where I get most of my bruises.

My stomach.

Everything

But, I'll hide it. And it'll end up getting better. I keep repeating inside of my head.

My burning eyes stay on him. "Yeah, you will. Because I'll kill him, Mae mae. If I see one more bruise, red mark, anything on you. I will fucking kill him. I can't take it." He admits. And I watch as he tries to blink the tears away, but they just pour down his pink tinted cheeks, beautifully.

'I'll kill him.' And I knew he wouldn't lie, I could just feel it in the pit of my stomach.

The corners of my plump lips start to curl down, and I couldn't stop it. Because I didn't want to see him like this, it hurts. I brush his other words off. I needed him to stop crying, it hurts. And I could feel my breathing start to stagger second by second.

My chest was tightening.

"It's okay, everything will be okay. I promise, Jayj." I  assure him once again. And I try to make it sound as true as possible, because I wanted it to be true, I needed it to be true.